Why would I EDC a Weather Radio?

I get different reactions when I show off the items I EDC.

While, like most, I usually carry a tactical flashlight and some sort of metal tool or knife along with my keys, wallet, smartphone, and a wristwatch. My psychiatrist refuses to clear me for a concealed weapon carrying permit, but one day I might open carry my Ruger LCP. Without getting too political, I am absolutely 100% opposed to any and all forms of gun control!

As a Christian, I also carry a copy of God’s Holy Word, namely, the Bible. For doing so I get kudos from fellow believers and mockery or even hostility from worldly or lost people, but that is totally expected.

I frequently carry a scanner radio, but no one really bats an eye about that. In public, I am frequently mistook for a firefighter when I carry it.

There are two items I carry that frequently raise questions from others in the EDC community.

One item is a calculator which I can easily explain and most will accept the answer. After all, I’ve been fascinated by calculators almost as long as I have been fascinated by flashlights and that is since infancy. As a high school math teacher, my Mom EDCs a calculator or two for work, though in reality, she eschews them. However, she is the reason why I became fascinated by calculators. My Dad was a banking executive when I was born and I don’t know if he ever carried a calculator or not, because he was laid off from the bank a few months after my birth. He then switched careers and eventually became a special education teacher. Even though my Dad was a sporting goods salesman for a couple years during the career change, he isn’t into EDC at all. His Dad, my Paw Paw, was into EDC at least to some degree, although he only owned extremely budget-friendly items. My Maw Maw also carried a flashlight in her purse for as long as I knew her, until she became a shut in and passed on December 28, 2019. At one point I’m almost sure she had an old school Pelican MityLite 1900! There were always calculators around though while I was growing up and I had been carrying one on and off since the age of eight. So, even though I am fascinated by calculators, when asked why I carry them, I can quickly justify and have done so.

Another item that I continuously EDC is a pocket-sized weather radio. While no one has directly questioned my motives as to why I do so, I’m sure I at least get eye rolls when I post pictures of mine or pull it out and listen.

In this piece, I am going to give a testimony on why I personally carry a weather radio and while I don’t expect you, the reader, to follow suit, maybe my reasons for doing so will be better understood.

Let’s go back to the Summer of 1990. I was three and a half and my brother and sister were a few months old. My Mom was off from teaching school, but my Dad was at work, working as a sporting goods salesman. There had been some storms going on all day. My Mom had baked home-made biscuits earlier in the day. It’s something, I can fry chicken almost identical to Colonel Sanders Original Recipe and my Mom can bake biscuits almost identical to Popeye’s Buttermilk Biscuits. I taught myself how to fry chicken that way, mostly through trial and error but also by God’s Grace. However, my Mom got her biscuit recipe from an old Catholic monk. The storms had gotten progressively worse during the day, then our electricity was disrupted. At some point, it became dark as night though it was only midday. My Mom gathered us into the center of the house and we sat there by the light of an Eveready Commander 6 Volt Lantern. The model number was 5122.

Though I was always afraid of the weather, I don’t remember being too frightened. I think it was because I was holding a flashlight and even back then I was fascinated by flashlights. I stood in the hall eating a biscuit.

We had no idea if there was actually a tornado present because we had no weather radio.

There was a Sears transistorized AM/FM radio that was put away, but I guess my Mom was probably more focused on getting all of us to safety rather than looking for that radio.

Even if my Mom would have been able to locate that transistor radio, the battery could have very well been dead. There was no way of us to know when the Tornado Warning, if any, had expired.

At some point, the sky lightened up and the electricity came back on and I guess we took this as the all-clear.

Looking back, this probably had an impact on me and is most likely was caused me to have a compelling desire to be accurately informed.

As I am writing this, I am reminded that back in the day, weather radios were somewhat of a status symbol, associated only with the affluent. I mean they were heavily marketed to golfers, of which playing golf during a thunderstorm is quite risky, so a golfer would desperately need one. I wonder if Donald Trump ever carried a weather radio in his younger days whilst playing golf. To further back up my claim that weather radios once were and maybe still are a status symbol now, at least to some degree is that, I’ve only seen upper-middle-class and wealthy people in possession of one. I’ve never once seen anyone from the lower socio-economic positions to ever be in possession of a weather radio. I have even read an article or two about how the white upper class are almost the only ones who purchase weather radios and that poorer whites, as well as most minorities, don’t even bother purchasing one.

While at the time, my family was lower middle class and stayed there until between 1997 and 2000. Now they are almost upper-middle class.

I didn’t know there was such a device as a weather radio until the summer of 1997 when I was reading some hurricane preparedness literature.

I wouldn’t actually own a weather radio of my own until late December 2001. It was an Oregon Scientific WR-8000. Unfortunately, it killed on me in less than two years, but I did EDC it when I could.

I myself as an individual would be considered impoverished by most standards.

Yes, I’ll admit that fully.

The only reason I am able to afford a weather radio (and I do own several) is that I either purchase them on clearance as new old stock, a friend gives one to me or I buy one in gently used condition for a fraction of the cost.

Between December of 2001 and April of 2015, I had gone through a few portable weather radios, many of which killed on me, unfortunately.

I guess it is poor quality control because I did not abuse these radios by any means.

Since the Spring of 2006, I had wanted a Midland HH50B, but it would be over nine more years before I would actually purchase one.

I had some desktop models that were on constant standby as well as a Radio Shack Weather Cube as a backup.

Then one day in late April of 2015, my area was experiencing some severe weather. This weather resulted in the one and only train derailment on the Huey Pierce Long Bridge near New Orleans. The said bridge was about eighty years old at the time.

My standby models had alerted me to a Tornado Watch in advance.

Then there were quite a few Severe Thunderstorm Warnings issued.

My then-wife, now ex-wife, as usual, was watching television.

However, I told her to get dressed in case we would need to move quickly.

The amazing thing is, she actually listened to me, though this was one of the very few times she did listen to me.

A few minutes later we received a Tornado Warning for our Parish.

The sky, though again around midday, became dark as night.

My apartment manager invited the second-floor tenants to her unit which was downstairs.

My now ex wife and I left with the clothes on our back, though I had a Mini Maglite LED in my pants pocket and I also had an Energizer Weatheready 6 Volt LED Lantern in my hand.

We made our way down the stairs and across the parking lot as lightning fiercely flashed.

The sky was still dark as night.

Several of us stood in the manager’s downstairs unit, anxiously waiting for the weather to pass.

Minutes crawled by, but, then, finally, conditions began improving.

The cell service was in and out that day, so none of us could rely on our phones, for weather data though at the time I didn’t even own a smartphone. I would though, a couple days later.

Several young women were wondering when the Tornado Warning would expire.

Eventually, I walked back up to my apartment and retrieved my Weather Cube, which while battery-powered, is still basically impossible to EDC.

I stood and listened to the weather report then when the Tornado Warning expired, I let everyone know and we all went back to our units and resumed our daily activities.

That day made me realize that I should own a weather radio that I could EDC in my backpack and even in my pocket if necessary.

I knew I was going to bite the bullet and soon purchase a Midland HH50B.

A little over a month later, I was able to score one brand new with batteries for ~$10 and free shipping. Thank God for eBay! I had been wanting one for years, so I gladly purchased it with my spending money.

At the time, I was also a new smartphone user and when my new weather radio came in, there was some literature enclosed in the packaging about downloading Midland Weather Center for Apple and Android devices.

I did just that and subsequently downloaded it on almost every smartphone I have owned since.

Granted this app is unfortunately no longer available on Google Play, but it can still be downloaded and installed on Android devices if you know what you are doing.

As for the Midland HH50B, I EDCed it from June of 2015 until December of 2017 when my then-wife now ex-wife broke it in a fit of anger.

However, I liked it so much that I quickly ordered a new one and it arrived on my doorstep a few days later.

I still EDC it in my backpack everywhere I go. And if I can’t have my backpack with me but I know I will be away from home or outdoors for any given time, I will have it in my right pants pocket next to my EDC flashlight.

It has come in handy numerous times either for stand by alerts for severe weather when I am not home or for sheltering in place during severe weather and monitoring the progress thereof.

The times it has been most handy is when I go on road trips and I am the passenger. I use it in conjunction with my Midland Weather Center app and use the weather intelligence gained to assist the driver in avoiding severe storms. I’ve even used it to confirm that there were no tornadoes nearby when my Dad called and thought there were. That was on January 20, 2017 and I was traveling with a friend between Shreveport and Dallas. A day later, though, while heading back home I used my weather radio to keep track of tornado near Nacitoches, Louisiana.

EDCing a weather radio has been very beneficial and never once detrimental, so I plan to do it indefinitely

I don’t know if these reasons will convince you, the reader, whether to also EDC a weather radio or not, but I hope this piece at least validates my reason to do so.

I guess this, therefore, concludes my piece and I hope you, the reader, have been informed and maybe even a little entertained.

Thank you for reading!

An Excerpt from “The Textfile”

…I want to see if anyone can guess which movies inspired me to write this scene…
…a classmate of Anna’s showed up and began to make trouble.
Tauntingly, the girl walked up to Grayson’s truck and said [to Anna], “Look at little miss Charlene Church, she finally has a boyfriend.” She paused and then continued, “I think I’m going to tell your parents about him, I bet they won’t like it.”
Grayson whispered to Anna, “Do you know this nasty thing that walked up here?”
Anna replied, “That’s Andrea Graves. Many guys think she is hot. She’s always so mean to me.”
“I don’t like her at all and I wish she was gone.”
The girl began to fondle her breasts through her tank top and finger her genitals through her biker shorts in front of Grayson and Anna.
Grayson began to lose his temper and said, “Why don’t you get lost?”
“Don’t be so rude, you know I could do so many things with you that I bet Anna Ryan would never ever do.”
Even angrier, Grayson continued, “You, are a nasty little skank. Furthermore, I love Anna with all my heart and I would never cheat on her.”
“There must be something wrong with you.”
“Yes, I guess I have a low tolerance for hateful and fake people.”
“I’m not that bad once you get to know me.”
“I don’t want to get to know you. Now kindly leave.”
“Maybe I don’t want to. It’s a free country after all.”
“That doesn’t give you the right to harass me or Anna.”
The girl then dropped her sunglasses, then turned her backside towards Grayson and bent over to pick them up.
Grayson shouted, “I don’t want to see your nasty, stinky, venereal disease-ridden body parts, so please quickly pick those sunglasses up and go elsewhere.”
“I was hoping you’d like the view, but maybe you need your eyes and head examined.”
“Not in your wildest dream, I don’t want you. I only want Anna, period! And if you don’t leave us alone, I’ll call the cops on you.”
“My family knows the police chief, the cops won’t do me anything.”
Anna was now extremely irritated and then said, “Don’t I have to deal with you enough at school? Why don’t you go screw some jock or something.”
“Maybe I want your man?”
“You can’t have him.”
“How are you going to back that claim to him up? I mean I could easily kick your butt if I wanted to.”
Grayson was completely fed up at this point and pulled his shotgun out of the storage box in his truck bed, pumped it, pointed it at Andrea, then said, “If you lay one finger on Anna, you will have many new holes in your body for all the boys to play with. That is if you indeed survive.”
“Okay, I’m going. You don’t have to be such a douche bag.”
Anna told her, “He’s not a douche bag, he just loves me. You aren’t loved, you’re just screwed.”
“This isn’t over. Your man cannot protect you when you’re at school.”
Grayson said, “God will protect her though, and by the way, that’s Someone Whom you should consider allowing in your life because you obviously need Him, whether you admit it or not.”
“There is no God!” Andrea shouted, then finally left.
Grayson picked his gun up and locked it in the storage box.
He then looked at Anna soberly and said, “I’m sorry you had to see me act that way, but I couldn’t allow her to harm you.”
Anna replied as she rubbed the hairs on Grayson’s chest, “You don’t have to apologize for anything. You just chose me over whom many think is the hottest girl in the whole school. I feel on top of the world.”
“You’re so much more beautiful than her, both inside and out.”
“Grayson, you’re definitely making me want to commit that sin with you, more than ever.”
“Sorry.”
“Don’t be. You just turn me on so much.”
…Now that you have read, please comment below which movies you think inspired me to write this…

A Synchronous Dream

This is a true story that begins with a dream in progress.  The actual dialogue may have been slightly altered, but other than that it is a true story.  It is about a synchronous dream I had in June of 2006 and it is told from my perspective.  This dream predates some of my more current writing styles and I assumed, at the time, it contained supernatural instructions.  My assumption was further validated when I found out this was indeed a synchronous dream!

Without further ado, here is the true story:

A global conflict has broken out and being an able-bodied nineteen-year-old, I have been drafted. I stand on the curb waiting for the bus to take me to the basic training camp, but there she is, the girl I’ve been conversing with, standing beneath the glow of the streetlamp.  She is dressed in olive green capri pants and a white tank top.  Her reddish-blonde hair flows down to her breasts in a single braid.

The bus is approaching and my best friend is urging me to get ready, but I can’t stop looking at her.

I approach her and she runs up to me. She jumps into my arms and I lift her up. She wraps her legs around me. We share a kiss. She feels so wonderful in my arms. The driver sounds his horn.

“I wish you didn’t have to go!”  She tells me in distress.

“Neither do I.  I’m a lover, not a fighter.”

“Just, please, write to me every day.”

“I will I promise!”

My best friend yells, “Forget about her and get on the bus. We need to fight in Vietnam like my dad did many years ago.  And this time, we’ll show those gooks that we mean business!”

I let her down gently and her eyes swell up with tears as we share one final kiss.

The bus driver announces over the PA, “Board now or you will be court-martialed.”

“Get on the bus [blank] damn it.” My best friend shouts.

Reluctantly, I board the bus…

Suddenly, I wake up.

It was all a dream.

I collect myself.

Thoughts are racing through my head:

“Is this a sign from God that I should enter in a relationship with this girl I’ve been talking to online?”

“I guess I really do have feelings for her after all.”

“But she wrapped her legs around me. In real life, I wouldn’t dare let her do that because I revere her so much.”

“Of course, I’ve never been in her physical presence, so I don’t know what I would allow happening. I know well that the flesh’s weakness is, unfortunately, greater than the soul’s willingness.”

I keep all these thoughts to myself for now.

I’m off today, so I go ride in my boat, then later, I visit my grandparents. I don’t tell them about her though.

When I arrive back home that night, I log into the family computer and begin to converse with the girl.

Over the course of our conversation, she randomly mentions, “I could feel you holding me last night!”

I am in shock and awe.

Apparently, we had a synchronous dream. My feelings for her are now beginning to multiply.

I feel dizzy and am in a euphoric confusion.

“I dreamed about you last night.” I finally reply, then explain the dream.

She too seems shocked, but happy.

We don’t talk much longer and then I go to sleep as I have work in the morning.

I’ll see if I can pull a double…

Confessions and a Storm-Talking in the Loft

“Lead the way,”  Liam said.

At once, Aubrey led Liam onto her parents’ property and then into the barn.

She walked to the breaker panel and turn the lights on, then they walked to the loft, where they sat and talked.

“So, Liam, tell me your long story,” Aubrey said with great interest.

“Well,” Liam replied, “I’m nineteen years old and I want to make sure, first of all, that you’re not jailbait. I did enough time in juvenile detention and I definitely don’t want to go to men’s prison.”

“I’m twenty-two actually, but I’ll take it as a compliment that you thought I was younger!” Aubrey said, blushing.

“Okay, then here’s my story:” Liam continued, “From an early age, my parents beat the daylights out of me for anything and everything. I grew up in a small conservative town where such parenting styles were encouraged. One day, my dad was beating me and I fought back. I was fifteen years old and couldn’t take it anymore. So, I gave him a bloody nose. My mom called 911 and I was arrested. While I was in custody, the sheriff raped me multiple times. And when I attempted to report him, he beat me with his club and threatened to kill me if I ever spoke of it again. I got raped twice more in the juvenile hall where the judge ordered me to stay until my eighteenth birthday. As soon as that time came, I left that town and never looked back. So for the past year and a couple months, I’ve been freight-hopping to travel and doing odd jobs for cash. I’ve been all over The States and even parts of Canada. I just got off of a train at the marshaling yard outside of this town and now I am looking for work.”

Aubrey embraced Liam, cradled his head in her lap and played with his hair, as she told him, “Wow! I wish I could have rescued you because you’re so sweet and didn’t deserve any of that horror. I too have a past, so I can somewhat understand you, that is if you want to hear it.”

“Well you’ve heard mine, so I definitely want to hear yours,” Liam replied.

“Well, I was engaged to marry my high school sweetheart. I thought he truly loved me and that he would stick by me no matter what. Then one autumn evening, we were having a bonfire and he was drunk and passed out. Three boys gang-raped me. I kept it to myself for the longest time, but because of the trauma, I started gaining weight. He became less and less attracted to me. I know I had gotten fat and he distanced himself from me because of it, but we still planned the wedding anyway. Well, he jilted me at the altar and now I’m basically a spinster living on my parents’ farm.”

“I think you’re beautiful, weight included!” Liam said as he looked up into her eyes.

“Thanks. You’re so sweet.” Aubrey replied, wrapping her arms and legs around him.

“I feel so safe in your embrace. I never want to leave it.”

“Then don’t leave it, ever!” Aubrey told him as she kissed him.

“Where will I find work though?”

“There’s lots of cash jobs here. Why even on my daddy’s farm!”

“Farm work is tough, but I’ve done tougher!”

“Yes, it’s tough, but I can get you guaranteed work, especially if you have any future with me. I mean would you even want me?”

Liam smiled from ear to ear, nodded and then said, “I sure would. You’re so pretty and you’re being so kind to me. I think your weight makes you sexy and I too have a past, so I think we would understand each other and be an awesome couple.”

“Oh, Liam, you’ve made me so happy. I never thought I would find anyone else ever again!”

“And now there may be some very needed stability to my life as well.”

With that, a bolt of lightning hit the transformer and the barn became totally dark aside from the light from the window.

Liam reached into his pants pocket and pulled out a Mini Maglite. He then put that flashlight in candle mode and lit up the barn, as he said, “Best eight dollars I ever spent right here!”

Aubrey smiled and said, “It’s cute how you’re so prepared!” She then kissed him.

“I try my best,” Liam replied, blushing.

“That’s a really neat backpack.  I’ve never seen one like it.”

“Thanks.  I bought it at a high-end shop in Uptown New Orleans.”

“What else do you have in that backpack?”

“A Uniden Police scanner with its charger, some Winchester hobo tools, a couple of tee shirts and slacks, my canteen and some freeze-dried food and my backup flashlight a Streamlight Stylus Pro. A railroad bull sold it to me, little did he know, I had just snuck off a freight train in the yard he was supposed to be patrolling. I made up a story saying how I was interested in the yard because I was interested in buying his flashlight and he believed me then sold it to me!” Then Liam reached into his other pocket and pulled out a Case Trapper pocket knife and said, “I’m really proud of this. An old man that I briefly stayed with gave it to me for helping him around his house. He was unfortunately then committed to a nursing home and he gave it to me. That old man was the closest I ever had to a family.”

The weather began to get really dark.

Liam looked at his G-Shock and then said, “Might be a tornado, it normally doesn’t get this dark around three in the afternoon.”

“Can’t you get weather band on that police scanner you have?”

“Yes.”

“Then tune it in!”

Liam turned his scanner on and then accessed the Weather function. Seconds later they heard the warning tones and a tornado bulletin.

“That’s this county!” Aubrey said nervously.

She pulled a Midland two way radio out of her dress pocket, turned it on and keyed up saying, “Daddy, we were just issued a tornado warning. Come to the storm cellar.”

Her dad’s voice crackled in, “I’m coming right now, baby girl. Just make sure your mother knows as well.”

“Where should I go?” Liam asked.

“In the storm cellar with me and my parents, where else?”

“Thank you!”

“Thank me later, let’s just get down there!”

Aubrey and Liam rushed down the loft stairs and then out of the barn.

Though it was around three in the afternoon, the sky was ominously black.

Aubrey’s mother was walking outside calling for her daughter by the light of a vintage Eveready Commander Lantern.

Liam shined his Mini Maglite as he was following Aubrey to the cellar door.

“Aubrey, who’s this young man?”

“I’ll tell you once we’re all safe, just let him in he has nowhere to go!”

“Fair enough, Aubrey.”

Moments later, Aubrey’s dad pulled up on his John Deere tractor, parked it, then by the light of a Rayovac Workhorse flashlight that he kept in the cab of his tractor, also rushed to the cellar.

Once all were inside, the door was bolted.

The storm raged on with its fury…

Back to “Talking in the Loft”

The Beginning-Talking in the Loft

April 29, 2006
The train was slowing into the yard. Liam Hartford was hiding in an empty closed hopper and knew that he must get out quickly, without being detected.

He kept a listen on his portable Uniden scanner for the whereabouts of railroad personnel.

Liam placed his scanner into his Wenger backpack, along with the rest of his belongings, then peered out of the hole of the hopper car.

It was a slightly overcast day and the yard didn’t have much activity going on.

Through communication intelligence gathered on his scanner, Liam knew the train he was on would be broken down that night and wasn’t familiar with as to where the car he was hiding in was destined, so he decided to get off in this yard and find a barn to hide in. He knew there was a farming community within walking distance of the railroad yard.

Liam left home the day he turned eighteen, which was a year and some months ago.

He had a rough childhood and knew he had to get out of his town as soon as he could. For the next year and some odd months, he supported himself taking odd jobs for cash and purchasing items to help him in his transient lifestyle.

He had traveled all over the United States and even into parts of Canada, usually riding illegally on freight trains.

The train was now at a dead stop as Liam kept watch from the hole in the hopper car.

There weren’t too many people in the yard, so he grabbed his backpack came out of the hole and disembarked from the train.

He made a beeline for the yard exit, just as the sky was getting darker.

Finally, he was on public property and escaped the yard without getting caught, as he had done dozens of times before.

Now, it was time to find shelter and work.

Liam began walking along the main highway, then through town.

He filled up his canteen at a water fountain in the park and also relieved himself in the park restroom.

Afterward, he left the park and headed on foot towards the more rural parts of town.

He admired all of the quaint farmhouses as he walked past them.

The sky was getting darker and darker.

Liam looked at his Casio G-Shock and saw that it was around two in the afternoon.

He knew his time was fairly accurate because he synchronized his watch with a sympathetic train conductor just days ago.

He saw a US Mail truck delivering packages and letters to homes along the main highway. He soon was past the mail truck

Liam then came upon a two-story wooden farmhouse with a large red barn. The house appeared to be one of those houses that were offered in the Sears Catalog in days gone by.

He thought about hiding in the loft of that barn at least until the storm passes.

As Liam stood still, a beautiful young lady stepped out of the house, to check the mail.

They briefly glanced at each other, smiled then both blushed.

She was dressed in a knee-length, plaid blue dress, brown work shoes and had long strawberry blonde hair. The young lady was ever so slightly chubby, but it made her all the more beautiful

She walked up to the mailbox and opened it, but there was no mail in.

There was a look of some disappointment on her face.

“The mail isn’t here yet, but it’s coming. I just saw the truck,” Liam told the young lady.

“Thanks. How far is it, do you know?”

“Oh, a few houses back. If I was able to pass it up on, foot, it can’t be too far.”

“Okay, I’ll wait out here, then.”

There was a brief silence, but then she said, “You’re cute. I’ve never seen you in this town before.”

“Aw, thanks. I’m not from around here, actually. By the way, you yourself are quite lovely as well!”

“You’re so sweet to tell me that. Will you be here a while?”

“As long as I like!”

The young lady’s eyes lit up, then she said, “I’m Aubrey Gables, by the way.”

“Liam Hartford.”

“What brings you here anyway?”

“Looking for work and shelter. It’s a long story actually.”

Suddenly there was a bright flash of lightning followed by an ominous roll of thunder.

“Durn it,” Liam said in distress.

“Why don’t you come up in the loft of my daddy’s barn where you’ll be safe and tell me your long story?”

“Thank you. I’d be more than happy to, but what about the mail?”

“The mail can wait, let’s get you safe from that weather…”

Back to “Talking in the Loft”

A Better Day and Night-Persecuted Affection

The next day as Kurt was walking to the bus stop, both of his parents approached him.

“Now, I know your excited to have Eileen as your girlfriend but as far as anyone at the school knows, you and her are broken up,” His dad said.

“I know,” Kurt replied. Then continued, “I want to meet her at the YMCA tonight. Could you bring me?”

“Of course,” His dad answered.

“But keep those hormones in check,” His mom added in.

“How can we do anything at the Y? The lifeguard won’t even let us hug or kiss,” Kurt answered.

“I just don’t want to raise a grand baby yet. Wait until you have a degree or a trade and a good job, so you can raise it,”

“And a place of your own,” His dad added in.

“Yes. I know,” Kurt said with a slight irritation.

“We’re only looking out for you,” His mom said.

“But we’re glad you have a girlfriend and we’re sorry you have to keep it a secret,” His dad finally said.

“Yes, but once you go to a different school next year it won’t be so bad, now you go and board the bus. We have to get to work,” His mom added.

Kurt walked to the bus stop and waited for the bus to come.

Finally, it arrived and he boarded.

The ride was quick and he soon arrived at school and sat on the bench.

Johacim and Matthew saw that he arrived and began to start harassing him.

He kept thinking about Eileen and was able to successfully tune them out.

Instead he pulled out his assigned book and began to read where he left off.

Matthew and Johacim whispered to each other, then Matthew came and knocked the book out of his hands.

Johacim then threatened to throw it in the toilet of the restroom.

Kurt told him, “Go ahead you’ll be vandalizing school property.

Mrs. Kraft was on duty and witnessed the latter parts of the event.

She told Johacim, “You will be suspended if you damage that book!”

Kurt then told her, “Matthew also knocked it out of my hand while I was reading it.”

“No recess for the next week for you,” She told Matthew.

“That’s messed up,” Johacim added in.

“No, what is truly messed up as you say is that both of you constantly harass Kurt and get away with it. But not under my watch!”

She then looked at Matthew and said, “Hand the book back to Kurt and apologize to him!”

Matthew rolled his eyes and did so, albeit very begrudgingly.

Kurt went back to reading until the bell rang.

All the students went to their respective classes.

Mrs. Kraft continued the science lesson on bovines. Most of the lesson was how cow’s milks is used for human consumption

Kurt listened intently until Johacim said, “I wonder if the milk I poured on my Oreo Os this morning came from Eileen Cartensen’s boobs; I mean she is a cow!”

Several classmates laughed.

“To the principal’s office-now Johacim!” Mrs. Kraft sternly said.

“But she doesn’t even come to this school,” He protested.

“I don’t care where she goes to school is still a human being with feelings and she deserves dignity! Furthermore you said a word that is totally inappropriate for class.” Mrs. Kraft said with anger.

Johacim left the classroom and went to the office, sulking.

Mrs. Kraft continued the lesson, until it was time to teach social studies.

The lesson was about the Watergate Scandal, but in a way seventh graders could understand.

After the lesson was concluded, Mrs. Kraft asked each member of the class if they had chosen their president to do a project on.

Kurt, off the top of his head chose Ronald Reagan, as he had forgotten all about it.

No one else chose Reagan so it went fine for him.

Then it was time to switch classes.

All the students lined up and exited, then headed for Bouchard’s class.

“Where is Johacim?” She asked.

The whole class remained silent.

“Well either tell me where he is, or no one will have recess today!” She continued.

“One girl at last spoke up, “He got sent to the office for saying something inappropriate in Mrs. Kraft’s class.”

“I see. Well, we need to begin our lesson. Everyone take our your religion books,” Bouchard commanded.

Kurt pulled out his religion book and listened as Bouchard lectured, “Sex is meant to be had only in the confines of marriage and strictly for the purpose of procreation. Sex in any other form than this is a mortal sin.” She paused and then continued, “In 1960, birth control was put on the market and since then society has morally plummeted. Before birth control was available, anyone having sex ran the risk of making more mouths to feed. That was a good thing because it more or less limited sex to only those who were financially capable. And those who had pregnancies out of wedlock were shunned from society. Those were glorious days. But then birth control came along, but let me tell you something class, birth control doesn’t always work. Of course now when birth control fails for an unfit mother, she goes on welfare and my tax dollars have to support her and her baby. If I find out that any girls in this school are on birth control, they will be expelled on the spot. It is impossible to be a good Catholic and use birth control, so I refuse to let my students use it. Sex was meant for procreation not recreation.”

By this point, Kurt began to daydream about Eileen.

He tuned Bouchard completely out and thought about how he would see Eileen later that evening at the Y.

Finally Bouchard’s lesson on the supposed evils of birth control was over and she starting lecturing about English.

By this point Johacim returned to class, with a smirk on his face.

Bouchard continued lecturing on English and had a way of sucking all the fun out of grammar and making it as miserable as possible.

Kurt tried to pay attention because of Eileen’s suggestion for him to be a journalist one day.

Finally the bell for little recess rang, to which Kurt went relieve his bladder in the boy’s restroom then got a drink of water and sat by the wall.

He thought about Eileen for the entire recess period, hoping and praying that they would spend some time at the Y later that evening.

Just as he was enjoying his thoughts the bell rang and he headed back to class.

Then there were some spelling and reading exercises.

Finally it was time for lunch. The class line up and walked to the cafeteria.

There was hamburger steak, mashed potatoes with gravy, green beans and banana pudding for dessert.

Kurt ate with everyone else but was soon finished. He pushed his tray forward then put his head down.

Matthew said, “Hey Kurt, where do hamburger steaks come from?”

Kurt ignored him until it was time to pick up the tray and head to big recess.

Once again Kurt went sit by the wall and watched everyone else play. As usual he began to fantasize about Eileen until the bell rang.

Then it was time for the PE period.

Kurt played put out once again, but deliberately got put out so he wouldn’t have to play anymore.

Finally it was over and he walked back to Mrs. Kraft’s class for math class.

Mrs. Kraft decided to teach a little ahead of their grade level and began to talk about the polygons.

Kurt listened intently and it came as a breeze to him.

The teacher then had them pull out the TI-30 calculators to do various formulas for those polygons.

Kurt had hated math up until Mrs. Krafts class, but he began to appreciate it because of her ability to make the lesson understandable.

Finally the dismissal bell rang, so Kurt went out on the benches to wait for the bus.

Mrs. Sandra Mathers was on duty, so Kurt got real quiet as he knew she was out to get him.

Instead he pulled out his two line display TI-30 and began to practice the formulas for the different polygons.

Miraculously, Mrs. Mathers didn’t harass him.

Finally Kurt’s bus pulled up, so he boarded.

The ride was boring but fairly quick.

Kurt arrived home and asked his Dad who had gotten off from work and was watching Fox News in the den, “Can you bring me to the Y tonight?”

“I guess so. Are you and Eileen going to hang out?”

“I’m going call her to see if she can.”

“Well, you need to exercise, so I want you to go whether she can go or not.”

“I know.”

Kurt walked to his room and picked up his cordless phone and dialed Eileen’s number.

“Hey you!” She answered.

“Oh, I missed you so much.” Kurt replied.

“I missed you too. What’s up?”

“I was wondering if we could hang out at the Y tonight?”

“Let me ask my Mom, be right back!”

Kurt waited anxiously.

Finally Eileen came back and said, “I’ll be there at 6:45.”

“Awesome I cannot wait to see you.”

“Now I have to do my homework.”

“I do too.”

“Well, I love you, Kurt!”

“I love you too, Eileen!”

They then hung up and Kurt went back to his Dad.

“Eileen will be at the Y at 6:45 this evening.”

“Okay, that’s cool. I’ll bring you. Now go do your homework.”

Kurt started his homework. First he did the math and everything with the polygons. Then he did science and was angered about how his classmates compared Eileen to a cow. He knew he was going to shower her with much affection later that evening. Then Kurt did his history worksheet and filled it out. Afterwards he read “Holding Steady” until it was time to go to the YMCA.

Kurt’s Dad drove him there in the blue sedan, then went in the men’s locker room. Kurt went in the boy’s locker room and changed into his swimming trunks.

Afterwards, he jumped into the pool. Eileen then jumped in afterwards.

Their eyes met and they shared a strong hug and a passionate kiss.

There was a female life guard on duty, who commented, “Y’all are so cute together. Just be careful though.”

Eileen then said, “Let’s swim together so we can exercise!”

“Sure thing, Eileen,” Kurt replied.

With that they began swimming vigorously next to each other until out of breath.

Both went into the shallow section of the pool and stood next to each other.

“Do you think I am sexy in my bathing suit?” Eileen asked Kurt.

Kurt kissed her and said, “I sure do!”

“Aw, you’re sweet!” Eileen replied, then continued, “Hold me in your arms!”

Kurt wrapped his arms around Eileen and kissed her forehead. Eileen rested her head in Kurt’s chest and they stood there holding on to each other and happy as can be.

There was music playing on a loud speaker, so they slow danced in the pool for the rest of the evening.

During the course of their dancing, Eileen said, “Everyone was so mean to me at the Lion’s Club dances, so I stopped going, but maybe you can take me there and we can dance together!”

Kurt replied, “I’d love to take you. I never went to those before because I knew no one would dance with me.”

“I sure will and only with you,” Eileen said with a big smile, then continued, “You’d only dance with me, right?”

“Yes. Only you. I can’t picture myself with anyone else!”

“Yay!” Eileen said as she kissed him.

They went sit outside on the lawn chairs, holding hands and kissing until it was time for the pool to close.

So Kurt and Eileen got dressed in their respective locker rooms then went wait in the lobby for Eileen’s parents to pick her up.

They pulled up in their white mini van and Eileen introduced Kurt to them.

“You must be Kurt, I’ve heard so much about you!” Her Mom said.

Kurt blushed and nodded.

“That’s my baby girl, so I expect you to be good to her. She has been through so much already.” Her Dad added in.

Kurt looked him in the eye and said, “Of course I’ll be good to her. I know what it’s like to be mistreated also, but I think the world and the moon of Eileen!”

“That’s what I want to hear!” Her Dad answered.

“Why don’t you have dinner with us Friday Night, Kurt?” Her mother asked.

“I’d really like that!” Kurt replied.

Kurt’s Dad was walking into the lobby and he greeted both of Eileen’s parents as well as Eileen.

“You raised a fine young man!” Eileen’s Mom told Kurt’s Dad.

“Yes. We have been praying that God send someone for our daughter.” Eileen’s Dad added in.

“Well I try. Kurt is crazy about Eileen as well.”

They talked for a few more minutes until it was announced that the YMCA would be closing so they all left.

The ride home was silent but happy for Kurt.

Upon arrival he called Eileen, to which she answered, “Hey you!”

“Hey. I was just calling to say we made it home safely and to tell you good night.”

“Okay, I have to get to bed in a few minutes myself.”

“Well just know that I love you!”

“I love you too, Kurt!”

They both hung up and went to bed happier than ever…

Back to “Persecuted Affection”

Christmas Day Part One-Second Chances

My medication has worn off and I am waking up in my girlfriend’s arms.

It is Christmas Morning and she is sleeping with her head on my chest.

I give her a gentle kiss and then just lay there.

She is slowly waking up as well and she pecks me on the cheek.

“Merry Christmas, baby!” I whisper to her.

She smiles from ear to ear and replies, “Merry Christmas,” Then puts her glasses on.

I hug her tightly. She moans and coos with happiness.

We exchange several kisses but then she says, “Okay, I have to potty now-my bladder is full and I’m about to burst!”

I let go and she walks to the bathroom.

I wait for her on the convertible sofa.

I then hear the toilet flush and the sink turn on and off.

She steps out and kisses me as she playfully says, “Did you miss me?”

I simply blush and nod. Then I kiss her in return. She hugs me and buries her face in my chest.

“Now I have to go as well!” I tell her.

“The bathroom is all yours!” She replies.

I enter the bathroom then relieve my bladder. Then I flush the toilet and wash my hands.

She is putting away the bed of the convertible sofa as I exit the bathroom.

After she is done, she motions for me to sit on the sofa with her.

We sit close to each other holding hands and looking at the Christmas tree.

“I wish I knew you existed sooner because I would have bought you a gift for Christmas,” She tells me.

“Just give me your faith, your loyalty and your affections!”

“Oh, as far as I can see you will always have those!”

“I too wish we would have met much sooner, though.”

“Yes, but we have each other now!”

“If you will always be this sweet, I can honestly say that you were worth the wait!”

“Aww. Thank you!” She says then kisses me.

I begin to play with her long reddish blonde hair, to which she giggles.

She pulls my face into her breasts, which turns me on immensely.

I begin to kiss her breasts and she then says, “If we go any further, it will be a sin.”

“You’re right. I don’t want to commit that sin because then God might punish us and cause us to split up.”

“I don’t ever want that, because you seem so perfect for me.”

“And I would rather have you by my side forever and not sin instead of having a few fleeting moments of pleasure with you and then lose you!”

“Just hearing you say those words makes me want you even more though!”

“We need to pray for an escape route. If it didn’t offend God so much, I would indeed make love to you!”

“Ditto!”

One of the room mates comes walking out of her room and asks my girlfriend, “Could you make us all some coffee?”

“Will do.”

The room mate then asks me, “We buy a coffee and chicory blend that is really famous in this city. Would you like to try some?”

“Sure,” I tell her.

“Boil some milk too!” She tells my girlfriend.

“I’ll help,” I interject.

My girlfriend gets two sauce pans and a French press coffee maker out of the cabinets.

She then tells me, “Draw some water into one of the sauce pans and pour some milk in the other.”

“Will do!” I tell her.

I turn on the kitchen tap and draw some water in the pot then I get a gallon of milk from the refrigerator and pour some milk into the other.

My girlfriend then hands me a box of matches and says, “You’ll need these to start the stove burners.”

“Okay. I think my stove is like that too. Of course this house reminds me a lot of my house.”

“I’d like to see your house if that’s all right.”

“Sure. I’d be honored for you to be my guest!”

My girlfriend coos again then kisses me.

I light the stove and put the water on a high fire and the milk on a low fire.

My girlfriend pours the coffee bean and chicory root grinds into the French press.

We stand in the kitchen, waiting for the water and milk to boil. It’s quite cold, so we cling to each other for warmth.

I gently rub her love handles and she rubs my buttocks.

We sweetly stare into each others’ eyes, lost in time.

Finally, the water is at a rolling boil and the milk is warm enough.

The other room mate is waking up.

“Could you make us all some French Toast?” She asks.

“Sure.” She pauses, then looks at me and says, “Pour the boiling water into the top of the coffee maker and lower the milk to the lowest setting possible.”

I pour the boiling water and am greeted with an amazing aroma of the coffee and chicory brewing.

“Could you go to the Lazy Susan and get some nutmeg and vanilla extract?”

“Sure thing, baby!” I tell her.

While I find those, she is getting a big bowl from the cabinets and beating some eggs in it. I had her the vanilla and nutmeg, to which she pours it into the mixture.

“One more thing, get me a cup of sugar, baby.”

“I’m on it.” I tell her.

I get some measuring spoons and pour a cup of sugar into the mixture.

She mixes it all together, then takes the old loaf of sliced bread and dunks every piece into the mixture.

Afterwards, she takes a couple pats of butter and drops them in a skillet.

She lights the middle burner of the stove and the butter melts.

Once the melted butter is sizzling, she begins to cook the pieces of bread.

Finally they are all done.

She places the French Toast on a platter.

We all sit at the table and one of the room mates says grace.

My girlfriend takes a ladle and scoops some of the hot milk into the four coffee mugs, then she pours the coffee and chicory brew into the cups.

We all serve ourselves some French Toast.

As I eat, I say, “This is amazing.”

One room mate says, “You’ve got a good woman on your hands so you need to treat her right,”

“He does,” My girlfriend says.

The other room mate adds in, “Yes he does. I heard him say how he wants her by his side forever instead of just for a few fleeting moments of pleasure. Guys like that are very rare!”

I blush and smile from ear to ear.

The first room mate says, “That’s very sweet!” She then looks at my girlfriend and says, “You have a good man, so treat him right as well!”

My girlfriend and I share a sweet kiss then go back to eating.

One of the room mates ask me, “How’s the coffee?”

“It’s awesome!” I tell her, “Never had anything like it before.”

“Well, get used to it if you’re going to live in our city!”

“I do like it here, I must admit. I knew it would be a safe haven for those with my illness but I didn’t think I would do this well!”

“You’re blessed-remember that!” My girlfriend tells me.

One room mate then says, “Why don’t y’all walk around the neighborhood and have fun together. We’re going visit our family.”

“You would show me your house!” My girlfriend says.

“Okay. I’ll do that.”

“Just remember to always be good to each other,” The other room mate says.

My girlfriend clears the table and we wash the dishes.

Then her room mates get in their car and leave.

We bundle up then go for a walk…

Back to “Second Chances”

Flashlight Solidarity Fashion

If you, the reader, don’t know this about me already, I have spent and still spend extensive time reading about any and all subjects pertaining to flashlights.

I will say that EDC in its modern form began in 1984 with the launch of The Mini Maglite personal sized flashlight.

Ever since then, those who carry flashlights almost always will carry a rugged, compact metal flashlight of some sort.

However, people have been carrying flashlights almost since their initial invention in 1899.

Industrial Grade Flashlights as we know them can be traced back to the 1940s.

From that point on, but especially between the 1960s and the 1980s or 1990s, tradespeople and laborers, especially those in the transportation sector usually carried a 2 D sized Heavy Duty Industrial Grade Flashlight. They would tuck it away usually in their right back pants pocket, with the face protruding upwards.

I first read about this practice in the Summer of 2010.

During this time, I was also employed as a grocer.

Now don’t get me wrong, I do like grocery work and I am considerably good at it.

However, I worked for a God awful grocery company and the work environment was very spirit-crushing.

We were stripped of any and all dignity as much as legally possible.

We also were forced to wear humiliating uniforms.

As you, the reader, probably already know, I have a special fondness for flashlights.

My entire disability pension at the time and then some was eaten up by my rent and I was working part-time at $8 an hour.

Needless to say, I had very little spending money.

Industrial Grade flashlights, especially the incandescent models are pretty cheap and at the time they were the only flashlights I could afford to splurge myself with.

So, I would buy them whenever I had a few extra dollars to my name.

When I would buy one, I would do as much reading about it as possible. This is how I kept myself amused during my off-hours.

I didn’t have much spending money to eat out or do anything else, so my then-wife now ex-wife would watch television and I would read online.

Cable TV and Internet maintained the sanity that was many times just hanging on by just a thread.

Not only did it maintain the little sanity we had, it served as a window to the outside world because we had a very basic phone plan with very limited minutes.

Actually we went completely without a phone altogether for a month or two, but kept in touch with friends and family via the Internet.

We always had food on the table (without any SNAP benefits by the way) and I just thank God that I didn’t get her pregnant!

If the ultimate failure of my marriage can be boiled down to anything it, was these two factors:
A spouse whose personality was permanently altered for the worse due to fluid buildup on her brain a few months after us exchanging our marital vows.
AND
A miserable and demanding job during the honeymoon phase of that marriage.

I know I would be married to her for a little over eight years and honestly that was me trying to honor my God.

Things did slightly improve when I worked enough quarters so my disability pension was bumped up in January of 2011.

After my hours were drastically cut and I was demoted for no reason; I quit without warning in September of 2011. I have not been employed since.

My disability pension was bumped up again to in January of 2012 for working a few more quarters.

There have also been cost of living adjustments, since then, and I humbly but joyfully thank my God for it!

Okay, I think I’ve got my point across on how real my struggles once were!

I needed to get that off my chest and this is good therapy for starting a new year and a new decade off fresh!

So, as I mentioned before the work environment at this grocery company was very spirit-crushing.

When I first started there, I attempted to clip my portable scanner radio to my back pocket, just so I could have entertainment during the break periods.

The managers who wanted to suck any and all joy possible out of working for their company swiftly reacted and equally swiftly denied me the privilege of having my scanner on me.

Just for the record I never had it turned on while I was on the clock, just during break time.

So months later, I after learning how working people of previous decades carried a flashlight in their back pockets, I began to do so as well.

Most of the time I had a cheaper tactical model in my front pocket as well.

I was met with lots of positive reactions from my coworkers and only by the Grace of God, management never tried to stop me. These positive reactions from coworkers were the beginning of me being accepted for liking flashlights as opposed to being harassed, as in primary and some of secondary school.

I finally had a way to express my individuality and at the same time have a comfort item on me, which made the extremely toxic work environment a little more bearable.

I know some of you may think I was being smug and rebellious and possibly to a degree I was.

However, while I am not condoning my rebellion if any, let me just say that it was a reaction to oppression but more than that it was simply a desire to have a comfort item with me during a very uncomfortable time.

As a Christian, I do feel convicted as I am writing this because The Bible clearly instructs Christian employees to do their work as if they were doing it for God. There were times I did fail to do this.

However, the Bible is very harsh on oppressive employers and oppression in general as well!

So…

I’m no expert on fashion at all.

But, I’ve considered trying to start a fashion trend, though I highly question whether or not I will have any success.

However, what if we could invent this dress style which would entail a white tee-shirt, a newsboy hat of some sort, then either black, brown or khaki work pants, some sturdy but casual shoes or work boots and the crowning point either a vintage or a current Industrial Grade Heavy Duty 2 D Cell sized flashlight to be carried in the right back pocket, head protruding up! It could be to identify with and support the working class. I could see hipsters possibly doing this and maybe, just maybe, it could catch on to other groups of people.

While I am no longer a member of the working class, at one point I was simply mentally disabled, though high functioning, but now I am also physically disabled due to a back injury.  I am still and always will be a Millennial.

And many of my fellow Millennials are indeed heavily oppressed by the workforce with no foreseeable relief from this oppression.

Maybe it could be worn on the job, at least the flashlight portion, to show solidarity with other workers from now and previous times.

And for those that already carry flashlights anyway, still, carry your main flashlight on you, but have one of these aforementioned flashlights in your back pocket.

For those in hazardous environments, there are quite a few models that are approved for your job-the idea is to carry them in your right back pocket!

Flashlights give off light, which chases away darkness and exposes everything good and bad. We can use the flashlights as a symbol of chasing away the darkness of oppression that workers face even with all the rights they are supposedly guaranteed. We can also see them as the symbol of exposing the good intentions of the workers trying to support themselves and their loved ones and exposing the dirty dealings going on that cheat these workers out of so much.

I’m not trying to align with one political party or another, because they both have failed us, miserably.

This doesn’t have to be totally political anyway, it could just be an innocent fad started by someone who is fond of flashlights!

Christmas Eve Part Two-Second Chances

The house that my girlfriend and her room mates live in is a lot like mine. It must have been built around the same time.

I knock on the door and am greeted by one of my girlfriend’s room mates. It is the one who set us up.

“Come in,” She says.

I push my shopping cart loaded with cherry cordial and RC Cola, into the house, as I tell her, “This is for all of you from me.”

“Thanks. That was really nice of you,” She says.

“My pleasure,” I reply.

The other room mate comes into the living room and says, “Our room mate is crazy about you, just so you know, so I hope you only have good intentions with her. She’s had her heart broken before, so you better treat her right and not hurt her!”

“I’m crazy about her, as well, actually and I myself have been hurt before, so I will make it my utmost effort to treat her with reverence and love!”

“We’re holding you to that statement!”

“Where is she anyway?”

“She’s using the toilet right now but she’ll be out shortly. Just make yourself comfortable.”

I sit on the sofa. The television and cable box are tuned to the Music Choice Channel that plays Christmas Music.

I listen to the music while the two other room mates prepare the food.

Suddenly, I hear the toilet flush. Then I hear the sink turn on and off.

My girlfriend then walks into the living room and sweetly greets me wearing a knee length red dress, long white socks and brown buckle shoes as she says, “Sorry I wasn’t there to let you in but I had to potty real badly.”

“Oh, that’s all right,” I tell her.

We then share a sweet kiss.

“Is that us sealing our pact?” She asks.

I reply, “No that was just a greeting.”

I kiss her even more strongly and sweetly, then say, “This is us sealing our pact!”

She then hugs me really tightly and I gently rub her love handles.

We then sit on the sofa together and I pull the weather radio out of my shopping car, then say, “I wanted to give you and your room mates this, so y’all can be alerted to bad weather. I can set it up for you if you want.”

She looks at it and then says, “Cool that was really sweet of you,”

“Well, I always want to be prepared,”

“I know and it’s very cute!”

Her two room mates walk into the living room and she holds up the Weather Radio still in its package and says, “Look what my boyfriend got us!”

“Neat. That will come in handy during the spring and summer,” One room mate says.

The other one tells me girlfriend, “Since you stay in the living room, you can put it on the table next to your convertible sofa and if there is a tornado in the middle of the night, it will wake you up, then you can come get us and we can all go inside the hall closet.”

I then interject and say, “It also has a compartment for backup batteries, so y’all can take it in the closet and listen for progress of the bad weather. I have one set up in my house,”

“Do you own or rent?”

“I own. I have to pay a mortgage for the next thirty years, but at least it’s mine,”

“Cool we’re cousins and our family owns this house. We both work and we can easily commute to our jobs from here so that’s why we stay here. We met your girlfriend at church and we let her stay with us.”

“I help out with the utilities whenever I get my disability check and I keep it clean,” My girlfriend adds in.

One of the room mates says, “She’s very sweet, you’ve got a good woman on your hands!”

The other one answers, “He seems like a keeper though and they do make a cute couple!”

“Thanks for the kind words. I could really use some encouragement,” I tell them.

“Is something bothering you?” My girlfriend asks.

“We can talk about it later, because we’re having a good time and I don’t want to ruin that, but my next door neighbor is making trouble with me,” I tell her.

“I won’t mind if we talk about it now, besides we made a pact, so let me help you!”

“Okay, here goes: my next door neighbor has been stalking and harassing me ever since I moved in the other day. He watched me make groceries at Melinda’s and then pay for them with my EBT card. As I was walking in my yard, he commented that his taxes paid for my groceries and that I was a lazy mooch,”

One of the room mates then said, “You have a medical condition and you need help, so don’t feel bad, in fact take advantage of it. Our friend also has a medical condition and Lord knows she deserves all the help she can get.”

The other room mate continues, “You probably don’t get enough from disability to buy much food, so you do indeed need food stamps.”

“It gets worse though, he was harassing me again today and threatened to report me to the government because he thinks I am faking my disability,”

My girlfriend says, “He thinks you’re faking it because your medicine obviously works very well, but those in the government know how you would be if you didn’t have that medicine, and they know how that medicine hinders any significant amount of work, so they won’t cut your benefits. But just to be on the safe side, we can all pray for you!”

I hug my girlfriend to which she begins to play with my hair, then I say, “Thank you. I do feel better now!”

She kisses me, then says, “Of course. You know we made a pact though and I can be a handful at times too!”

“And I promise to try my durn well best to comfort you when you have an episode. You wouldn’t break up with me during an episode though?”

“No. I would never break up with you! I know a good man when I see one and the only way you could lose me is if I died or you became abusive.”

“Well, I was abused in all kinds of ways by my ex wife, yes it happens to men as well, so I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. I would only hit someone if my life or the life of someone I care about were in danger.”

One of the room mates then say, “She was sexually and physically assaulted by an illegal Mexican immigrant and that is why she is like she is.”

“The other one adds in, “But she is really sweet in spite of all that and as long as you are good to her, she will make you her king.”

“I know she told me this the other night. And just for the record I want her to be my queen! She knows this already, but if it makes y’all feel better, my abusive ex wife is also a Mexican!”

“Most people our age can’t stand Trump and maybe it’s because he is a disgusting individual, but at least he has a backbone and tries to do what’s best for the country,” One room mate says.

“Yes and he knows the Mexicans are a threat to our safety and security, not to mention they suck up resources that y’all need desperately, so he tries to keep them out of this country,” She pauses then says, “We’re both nurses so we see all of the people that are physically harmed by the Mexicans.”

My girlfriend then says, “I’m afraid of the Mexicans, don’t get me wrong, but it’s Christmas which is about Christ coming into this world to save us from our sins and Christ wants to save the Mexicans as much as He saved all of us! We all need a savior in His eyes!”

I feel convicted over what my girlfriend just said, but I say, “You’re so right baby, Jesus Christ is the reason for Christmas, and I must say you have a very Christlike spirit!”

“You do too and that is the main reason why I must confess that I am falling for you. I hope you feel the same way.”

I look into her puppy dog eyes then I tell her with a kiss, “I most certainly do feel the same way my only regret is that we didn’t meet much sooner!”

She steals a kiss. Then she plants several kisses all over my face.

“Y’all are so sweet!” One room mate says.

“And cute too!” The other one adds in.

They then go into the kitchen and continue preparing the dinner.

My girlfriend and I snuggle together on the sofa. She rests her head on my chest and I plant several kisses on her.

Time goes by quickly and then the dinner is served.

Happily we eat, then we watch Christmas movies.

Her two room mates then go off to bed.

I look at my watch. It is now near midnight and snowing outside.

“You don’t have to go home, you can snuggle with me all night long. I’d hate for you to walk home in the snow.”

“I’d like to stay, but I do revere you and our relationship.”

“Then be reverent and snuggle with me all night long. I won’t make you do anything sinful, although, I definitely want to do more than snuggle with you!”

“I desire you as well, no one has ever turned me on like you do!” I pause then continue, “But I want The Lord to bless our relationship,”

“Well, if it makes you feel better, we won’t have any privacy to do anything sinful, but you can still snuggle with me throughout the night. In fact, I’d really like that!”

“Very well, I’ll stay!”

I take my medicine with a sip of RC Cola and a few green beans from the casserole.

She begins to kiss me passionately.

We roll out the bed then get under the covers and snuggle all night long.

She sleeps partially on top of me and wraps her legs around me.

It is the happiest night I’ve had in a very long time…

Back to “Second Chances”

Christmas Eve Part One-Second Chances

It’s Christmas Eve Morning and I am waking up on my living room sofa.

I look my Casio wristwatch and it indicates that it is 10:59 in the morning.

My smartphone is charging on the nightstand next to my sofa.

I unplug it, then I give my newly found girlfriend a call.

It rings once, then I hear her answer, “Hey you!”

“Hey,” I reply.

“I’m glad you called,”

“Of course. How could I forget,”

She then giggles happily.

I continue, “I just wanted to touch base with you because I am just waking up.”

“Aw that’s sweet,” She pauses and then continues, “Are you doing anything this evening?”

“No, I hadn’t planned anything.”

“Then maybe you could come to me and my two room mates’ house and have dinner.”

“I’d really like that!”

“You would?”

“Of course. It means I get to visit a beautiful young lady!” I pause, then continue, “Now which beautiful young lady am I talking about?”

“ME!” She replies with a happiness in her voice.

“That’s right and don’t ever forget it”! I tell her.

“You just made my heart flutter!”

“And you make my life so bright!”

“I wish we would have met a lot sooner!”

“So do I!” I pause then ask her, “Is there anything I could bring?”

“You don’t have to bring anything but you’re handsome self.”

“But I have an ulterior motive-I want to stay on your two room mates’ good side because I want out relationship to work as smoothly as possible and there be no drama.”

“Aw, you’re so thoughtful! If you want then, you could bring some Cherry Cordials and a couple two liter bottles of RC Cola, then. We all drink RC Cola like crazy and we’ve been craving some Cherry Cordials!”

“Consider it done, then!”

“Yay!”

“What were you doing when I called?”

“I was getting ready to take a bath.”

“I’ll be doing that too so I can get ready for the day.”

“Where are you going to buy the candy and soft drink for tonight?”

“I was going to go to Melinda’s.”

“I know you’re on a fixed income, so maybe you could go to The Dollar General instead where they will be cheaper,”

“You mean The Ruble General!”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh. That’s a joke I made up year ago. The Ruble was the official currency of The Soviet Union and I always say that shopping at The Dollar General is like shopping in The Soviet Union because of the long lines and product shortages.”

“Oh. Now I get it. You’re so smart and funny!”

“Thank you! I’m glad you think so!” I pause then ask, “Do you know where one is?”

“Just across the train tracks. RC Cola is on sale for 2 liters for 85 cents and the Cherry Cordials might be on clearance by now.”

“I might see some trains then. I think trains are so cool!”

“You’re going to like it in this city-there are plenty of trains!”

“There’s a much more important reason why I like this city, though!”

“What is it?”

“Because you live here!”

“You’re making me blush!”

“You’re so cute when you blush! Well you’re always cute!”

“I wish I was there to kiss you!”

“I would definitely kiss you in return!”

“I know you would and I feel so happy!”

“I hope I’ll always make you happy!”

“Just always be as sweet as you are and just be patient with me even on my bad days and you will always make me happy!”

“I have bad days too, so I could somewhat relate to you, so I’ll be patient with you. Please be patient with me as well!”

“Then let’s make a pact: We will always be patient and understanding with each other, especially our mental issues!”

“Agreed! And I wish I was there to seal that pact with a kiss!”

“Aw well you may kiss me as soo as you see me this evening!” She pauses then says, “Not may, but must! You must kiss me!”

“I’d be honored to! Speaking of that, what time should I cross over?”

“Five PM is fine.”

“I’ll be there!”

“Yay! Now, we both need to bathe to get ready for the day, but I cannot wait to see you this evening!”

“As do I! Now you go enjoy your bath!”

“You too.”

“Okay bye.”

“Bye baby!”

We then hang up.

I go into my bathroom and open the valve on my wall heater, then strike a match and light it.

I then draw some hot water and sit down in the tub.

I wash my hair with my favorite shampoo then I wash my body with Dial soap.

It’s nice and warm so I relax for a while.

I feel my face and, even though I look clean shaven there is still a slight amount of facial hair, so I shave.

Afterwards, I rub some conditioner on my face and dry off.

I go into my bedroom and put on some black dress pants and a white tee shirt. Then I put on my belt socks shoes and an Evergreen Oxford shirt.

I sit on my bed then check my bank account on my smartphone.

There is $35.66 left in my account.

I know what I’ll do: I’ll go to Melinda’s and buy a Weather Radio for my girlfriend and her two room mates as a house warming present. Then I will buy the candy and soft drinks from The Dollar General.

I put my jacket on then I walk out of my front door, locking it behind me. Then I walk down my steps, across my front yard, out of the gate to my cyclone fence and off to Melinda’s.

My neighbor is angrily staring at me the entire time, but I manage to ignore him.

I make it to Melinda’s and I go to the housewares section.

I look feverishly for the Weather Radios but I don’t see any.

A clerk is passing by on skates, so I ask him, “What happened to all your Weather Radios?”

“Check the clearance bin,” He replies.

“Will do.”

So I walk to the clearance bin in the fron of the store. There is one Midland WR-120EZ marked down to $5 from $29.99. I’m thrilled. I pick it up then get in line to check out.

Finally it is my turn.

The young cashier scans my Weather Radio and I tell her, “Tell your boss that I say thank you for such an awesome deal! This will make a good gift for my girlfriend and her room mates.”

She smiles and says, “Well we’re glad you found it!” T

She tells me my total then I pay with my debit card.

I’m approved then a receipt is printed out.

“Do you need a bag?”

“No thank you.”

She hands me my receipt, then I say, “Thank you also for working on Christmas Eve and I want you to have a Merry Christmas!”

“Same to you and yours!”

I leave Melinda’s and walk back home.

My neighbor is picking up pecans from his pecan tree when he sees me with the Weather Radio in its package.

“What junk did you buy with my tax money?”

“A gift for my girlfriend.”

“You don’t deserve a girlfriend.”

“That’s none of your business.”

“It should be my business because you and her are going to make a baby and then the government is going to pay for it.”

“I’m going inside because I won’t dignify that with a response.”

“Because you know I am right.”

I up my steps, unlock my door and enter then lock it behind me.

I place the Weather Radio on my sofa, then I go to my utility room and get my personal shopping cart and push it through my living room then out of the front door, which I lock.

Then I guide it down my steps, across my front yard then out of my gate and along the sidewalk to The Dollar General.

I head east.

My neighbor asks me, “Where are you going now?”

“Why does it matter?” I ask him.

“If you live off the government you should have to give an account for all that you do and everywhere you go,”

“Well thank God you’re not in power,”

“I served my country though and I think you owe me some respect,”

“Yeah from what I hear you served your country to avoid jail time!”

“If you disrespect me again, I’m going to kick you where the sun doesn’t shine,”

“You lay one hand on me and I will press charges. Now if you want to be such a jerk, don’t talk to me again!”

“You’re just a spoiled, entitled snowflake brat and I question whether or not you’re really disabled. You just need to be horsewhipped in my opinion and I should report you to the government.”

“You’re harassing and threatening a mentally disabled person and if you don’t stop, I’m calling the cops!” I tell him as I pull out my smartphone.

“You may have won the battle but you haven’t won the war,” He says, then goes inside.

I make my long walk to The Dollar General, thinking about how I could lose my benefits if the wrong people in the government believe my neighbor.

The anxiety compels me to walk, so I walk hard making it to The Dollar General in record time.

I buy five boxes of Cherry Cordials and five two Liter bottles of RC Cola and pay for my items then go back home, making it back in record time.

I enter my gate, then cut across my front yard and up my steps. I unlock my front door and enter locking it behind me.

Then I sit at my computer and write for my blog until its almost 5 PM.

I then place all my purchases in my shopping cart, then I grab my EDC back and walk out the front door, locking it behind me.

Afterwards, I cut across my front yard then out of my gate and walk to my girlfriend and her room mates’ house, arriving there at 5 PM sharp…

Back to “Second Chances”