My Blog

My First Love

I was but four years old, the very first time I had fallen in love if one could call it that. This girl had the biggest impact on my life, more than probably anyone else with whom I crossed paths, aside from Jesus Christ.

Only those very close to me know this fact and many others assume, that my first love was a girl two years my junior whom I met in September of 1994 and lived up the street from me. I was with her from ages seven to nine.

The reality is, I met my first love some time early in 1991.

It was while attending a church nursery and/or preschool in the railroad town of Schriever, Louisiana.

This was a very rough time in my life, but this girl was so sweet to me, that I couldn’t help but fall for her, even though I was so young.

The reason why my life was rough at this time is that my brother and sister were infants and my parents didn’t have much time for me. I guess I took this hard because before this I was an only child. The other reason is that someone tied to my family was frequently beating the living daylights out of me. I have since forgiven him for beating me and am only bringing it up in this piece because it contributed to this traumatic part of my childhood. I was also special needs but no one at the time realized it.

I was sent to this church every Monday and Tuesday so I could interact with children around my age. To tell the truth, I hated going there, even though it was the only place I saw her.

She and I were always the first two children to arrive in the morning, so that is how we grew “close.”

There was also something about her, even though she was maybe only a little older than me, that she could tell when I was in distress and always had a way of comforting me.

There was even a time I happened to see the man who was beating me while being driven to that preschool and had my first of many panic attacks as a result.

When I arrived, Kristen saw that I was upset and somehow, she managed to calm me down.

There were numerous other times as well when she comforted me, though the only phrase I ever remember her saying is “Don’t worry.”

I ended up falling for her because of her kind heart, but also I thought she was beautiful.

She had porcelain skin, brown eyes, and light brown hair.

She frequently wore either blue and pink dresses. I don’t think I ever remember seeing her wear pants or shorts, which makes me wonder if she was raised in the United Pentecostal Church International or a fragmented church with similar doctrine. This church, by the way, was not UPCI or a non-denominational/fragmented church. Some of those churches strictly enforce dress codes, especially for women and girls, and also frequently teach their members to be reclusive from society and could be the reason why I have not seen her again.

Then in July of 1991, I would be taken out of the church preschool. Unfortunately, I would attend a far worse place for the next nearly ten years.

I remember the day I left very well. She crawled up to hug me goodbye, but I turned her down for fear of being teased.

That probably hurt her feelings immensely and I still regret it almost 30 years later at the time of writing this.

This was one of the worst mistakes of my life and if I had my life to live over, I would somehow have found a way to stay in touch with her, knowing what I know now.

To my knowledge, I’ve never seen her again.

The one time I think I might have seen her was on Easter Sunday, April 11, 2004, at the Wal-Mart in Thibodaux, Louisiana, but this is strictly speculation.

Since 2001, I’ve been trying to locate her and over the years I have asked hundreds if not thousands of women and girls with her first name if they were indeed her. None of them have ever told me “yes.” Many of them never replied, to begin with. Unfortunately a few have blocked me, for nothing more than asking an honest and harmless question. I feel as if people have become extremely block happy in recent years.

In 2004 and 2005, I went back to that church to look for her and did come across a couple of classmates since then but none of them remember her. Pay close attention to that fact!

Because her first name is Kristen, that means there are numerous methods to spell it and I am nowhere near sure of the exact spelling. This on top of not knowing her middle or last name nor even what year she was born in has made locating her all the more difficult.

This is the first time I am 100% public about this very personal story in my life, previously, I’ve only told people whom I deeply trust and I’ve gotten mixed reactions ranging from them thinking I am delusional to them thinking that she and I are indeed meant to be and to not give up on finding her one day.

While I was going through a divorce, I had renewed efforts in trying to locate her.

My main fear is that with me going public with this personal story, there will be some imposters that show up, which is why I have left out the details of exactly which church in Schriever, Louisiana, I met her at or the names of the teachers and other classmates, all of which I vividly remember.

I’ve come across several other classmates from that preschool and nursery, over the years, but the most shocking thing is none of them remember her at all.

I know some would maybe think that she was an angel that only I or maybe a few others could see.

The only reason why I wonder whether or not she’s an angelic being that only I could see is that I remember the teacher saying her name.

BOMBSHELL: She is the truest reason why I decided to start writing back on April 10, 2003. I used my memories of Kristen for most of my inspiration in my early days of writing.

There had been other women and girls who had inspired me to create characters and there had been some young ladies who reminded me of characters I created.

Unfortunately, I got into a relationship with a young woman which resulted in marriage and then ultimately divorce. The relationship lasted from 2007 to 2018.

Around 2014, I started searching for Kristen again, but to no avail. In that year, I also started writing stories again with her as my inspiration. Several of them are up on my blog.

In the latter parts of 2018, I stopped searching altogether, because I had entered into a very loving and stable relationship with a young lady that looked like a younger yet grown-up version of Kristen. Also, I took the fact that she was born in 1991 as a sign that she was the one. Unfortunately, on December 4/5, 2019, she called it quits on me. I was crushed but am finally starting to heal from it. I had gotten into a few brief relationships since but I always ended them for one reason or another.

A certain part of me wants to find her and find out whatever happened to her. Then my delusional self would either try to get to know her and maybe we could fall in love again or at least find out where she is now and let her know the impact she had on my life because it is a tremendous one, then wish her the best. I’ve also come to terms that she could be deceased and if that is the case, I want to visit her burial site and pay great homage and reverence to her. If she is still alive, romantically available and we meet again and get to know each other, physical features such as her size or facial beauty will not matter to me. Almost everyone who knows me knows that I am only attracted to plus-sized and/or super-sized women with pretty faces, but for her, I would try to pursue her no matter what she looked like. Also, nothing in her past would matter to me either, I would take her for who she is because I would remember how kind to me she was back then. For her, I could relax just about all of my standards. I do realize though that this is just a fantasy and that I need to move on.

Since 2014, I have been mentally creating stories of her and I together again after she helps me make a daring escape from some terrible people that had me captive. Because 2021 is the thirtieth anniversary of her and I meet, I may write down some of these stories. By the way, in my mind, they always took place in the year 2021! Possibly stay tuned. There is only one I wrote and did so in February of 2018.

Just for the record, I no longer think she and I are meant to be. The Lord has been showing me what my future spouse will be like and, she is similar in some ways but younger and nowhere near as maternal (for lack of a better word) towards me, though still very loving and affectionate. Also, with me being the male sex, God expects me to do [most of] the protecting and comforting not the other way around, so this is probably the main reason why he hasn’t allowed me to find her, assuming she is not an angel. At the risk of sounding unpopular, God indeed has established certain gender roles! Don’t shoot the messenger…

That’s all I have, for now, thank you for taking the time to read.

Back to “Personal Reflections”

Eli goes Shopping for Work Clothes-MMIV

Eli woke up to the alarm on his phone.

He stepped out of bed, then went to relieve himself.

He then walked back to his bed where he sat at the foot and called Hannah over the Chirp service and told her, “Good Morning my baby.”

“Good Morning sweetheart,” She replied.

“What are your plans for today?”

“Shop for school clothes with my mom.”

“I’ll probably shop for some work supplies with my Pappy.”


“When can you come to see me again?”

“How about I come to church with you?”

“Yay! I would really like that.”

“I would too.”

“Maybe we could do something together after church.”

“I would really like that too!”

“Do you want me to kiss you some more?”

“Of course.”

“It would be an honor to kiss you!”

“I can’t wait for you to kiss me again. Now I have to empty the teapot.”

“What kind of tea were you drinking?”

“I’m not drinking any tea. When I say that I have to empty the teapot, it’s a nicer way of saying I have to pee.”

“Oh okay. I just did that a few minutes ago. Let’s keep in touch throughout the day, though.”

“Of course, baby. Now, I really need to get to the bathroom before my panty and nightshirt are soaking wet and smelly. I love you!”

“I love you too!”

Afterward, Eli walked down the hall to the kitchen where his grandparents were finishing breakfast.

They quickly handed him a plate of smoked sausage, scrambled eggs, and toast with grape jam.

Eli also served himself some V8 Vegetable Juice from a can in the refrigerator.

He sat and ate as his Pappy read the newspaper and his MeeMaw flipped through the cable channels.

Eli finished breakfast, then washed his dishes.

When the dishes were clean, he asked his Pappy, “Would you bring me to Target so I can buy some white tee and Oxford shirts as well as some shaving supplies for work?”

“Sure. What about pants and shoes?”

“I was going to wear the work pants and work boots you and MeeMaw gave me for my birthday.”

“Good. Those boots have steel toes in them, so they will protect your feet while you work in the kitchen. I picked those out for you. Your MeeMaw picked out the pants and she says they are made of sturdy fabric.”

“I can’t wait to wear them.”

“Hannah would probably think you look good in them too!” MeeMaw Darla said, then continued, “I remember how good your Pappy looked when he put on his work clothes. I always made sure that he appeared in a way that everyone could set their watches to how sharp and dependable he looked!”

“Eli, what time do you want to go to Target?”

“Let me go shower and shave right now.”

“Good idea. I’ll get ready as well,” Pappy Wilson then looked at MeeMaw Darla and asked, “Honey do you need anything while we go shopping?”

“Get us some fresh batteries for our smoke detectors and we will have Eli install them.”

“Anything else?”

“I need a new flashlight for my purse, the last one I had cracked into many pieces.”

“I know a good brand, MeeMaw,” Eli interjected.

“I’ll also see if I can get some gardening supplies and some cabbage, broccoli, and turnip seeds to plant for the winter.”

“Yes, honey. And see if all medicines are ready as well.”

“Will do.”

Eli went to shower and shave while Pappy Wilson put on his going-out clothes.

After Eli was clean he also put on going out clothes, then retrieved his phone, flashlight, scanner, and wallet.

Pappy Wilson retrieved his wallet, keys, and pocket knife, then they entered his vintage Dodge D100 and headed to Target.

“You said you wanted some white Oxford shirts, Eli?”

“Yes sir, Pappy.”

“That brings me back to when I worked in the control room at the chemical plant. We had to wear black pants and a white Oxford shirt. We also had to be clean-shaven and keep our hair very neat. Well by that time I only had a little bit of hair, but I still had to shave.”

“I thought you worked in the raw materials department.”

“I did, but then I was promoted to the control room. It was fine until they started making me operate those dog-gone computers. Those computers make me want to pute.”

“So what did you do?”

“I tried my best to learn the system, but couldn’t. So the company forced me into early retirement. At least they gave me a handsome pension. I get almost as much money to sit at home as I would have if I were to continue working. But, I worked hard for that company and I gave them thirty-nine of my best years. I always did what I was told and carried out my tasks to the best of my ability. And when my tasks were complete, I asked for more tasks so I could make extra money. I took care of the company and now they are taking care of me. Now I have time to work in my garden and be with my family!”

“I know that MeeMaws flashlight that cracked was issued by your company and that y’all were required to use them. Why do they have to be made of plastic though?”

“If you drop a metal flashlight on something hard, it will create a spark. That can be deadly when you are handling flammable material. But sometimes we were working in the middle of the night when the barges delivered the chemicals so we needed light. The company ordered thousands of flashlights that are approved to be used around flammable material.”

“Oh, yes. I think I read something about that a while back on the Internet.”

“The company issued me a bunch of those over the years, and I kept them around the house. Your MeeMaw thought they were bright and rugged enough that she would keep one in her purse. Before you were born, she and I had gone to see a movie. A lady had dropped her purse and all the contents fell out. It was dark and they were using cigarette lighters to find everything that fell under the seats. Your MeeMaw became nervous about them potentially starting a fire, so she lent them her flashlight and they located everything safely.”

“Well, you and MeeMaw told me to always carry a flashlight.”

“Does Target sell the one you carry?”

“I think it does.”

“Good, then I will get one for your MeeMaw’s purse.”

“What about for you?”

“I have plenty of my battery-powered lanterns, for sowing crops at night.”

“Oh okay.”

Eli’s phone then beeped.

Hannah was calling him over the Chirp service.

“Where are you, sweetheart?”

“With my Pappy on the way to Target?”

“Oh okay. Y’all please be careful.”

“We will. My Pappy has a flawless driving record.”

“I’m leaving with my mom right now to buy some school clothes?”

“Y’all be careful as well.”

“We will.”

“What store you are going to?”

“Promise you won’t judge me?”

“I promise.”

“We’re going buy them at social concerns.”

“There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“Are you sure?”

“Most definitely. It doesn’t matter to me where you buy your clothes. You have a wonderful heart and you are the prettiest girl I have ever seen. I’m just glad you’re mine!”

“I love you, Eli!”

“I love you too, Hannah!”

“We just pulled up to the bust stop in front of the thrift store parking lot.”

“Well, we are about a block away from Target.”

“Be safe.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too!”

Moments later Eli and Pappy Wilson pulled into the Target parking lot. They found a decent spot and then entered the door.

“What should we get first?” Eli asked.

“Let’s get your shaving supplies.”

They walked to the personal care section.

Pappy Wilson said, “I know you use those cheap disposable razors but how about I buy you a good razor?”

“What do you have in mind, Pappy?”

He pointed on the pegboard to a Van Der Hagen safety razor that came with several replacement blades, then said, “I used something like this when I was a young man. I’ll get it for you.”

“Wow! Thank you, Pappy.”

“I’ll also get you some more blades, but please be careful when handling them.”

“Will do.”

“Now, did you need some shaving cream or aftershave?”

“Yes. I buy whatever shaving cream is on sale.”

“What aftershave do you like?”

“Aqua Velva.”

“Excellent choice, young man!” Pappy Wilson said, then whispered, “Your scent will drive Hannah wild, but y’all cannot act on those urges until she is eighteen!”

Eli blushed, then they walked to the men’s clothing department.

Eli selected three white Oxford shirts and a twelve-pack of white tee shirts.

They then walked to housewares where Pappy Wilson said, “Go get a pack of batteries for the smoke detectors, and then we will get a new flashlight for your MeeMaw’s purse.”

“We should get her one as I have but maybe in a different color.”

They walked to the flashlight aisle and Eli picked out a pink 2 AA Mini Maglite.

He then said, “We would need some bulbs as well.”

“Get a pack of bulbs for you and a pack for your MeeMaw.”

“Yes sir, Pappy.”

“Now, to the gardening section!”

“Right behind you, Pappy!”

They walked a few aisles over then Pappy Wilson placed a new shovel and a new ho in his cart. He then placed a packet of cabbage seeds, turnip seeds, and broccoli seeds in his cart.

“Could you plant some potatoes too, Pappy?” Eli asked.


Pappy Wilson then placed a packet of potato seeds in his cart as well.

They then walked to the pharmacy, where a technician told them that it would take thirty minutes to fill the prescriptions.

Pappy Wilson took Eli to the food court where they ate hot dogs and drank soft drinks.

Eli looked at his watch and saw that thirty minutes had passed.

The pharmacist was just done filling the medications and the technician handed them to Pappy Wilson.

They then walked to the registers and paid for their items.

A young man rang them up and Pappy Wilson began cracking jokes that made the young man laugh so hard that tears filled his eyes.

“That’s my Pappy for you,” Eli said also laughing.

They then left the store and loaded their purchased items into the storage box in the bed of Pappy Wilson’s truck.

As they headed home, Eli was listening to his scanner and heard a call come over to the fire department about a city bus in an accident with multiple casualties.

Eli became highly distressed and called Hannah over the Chirp service.

“Baby, are you all right?”

“Yes, sweetheart, why you ask?”

“I heard a call on my scanner about a city bus in an accident and there were multiple casualties.”

“We’re okay. We just got off the bus and are walking in the door right now.”

“Oh, thank God. I was so worried.”

“I’m safe at home now, but thank you for checking up on me. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“Where are you, Eli?”

“Pulling into my grandparents’ subdivision now.”

“Let me know when you’re home.”

“We just pulled in the driveway.”

“Okay, good. I love you, sweetheart.”

“I love you too. Let’s keep in touch throughout the day.

“Of course.”

They then unloaded their purchases.

Eli placed his shaving supplies in the medicine cabinet and hung up his Oxford shirts. He then placed the tee shirts in his chest of drawers.

Pappy Wilson placed the packets of seeds in his kitchen junk drawer and his gardening tools in the utility room.

With his pocket knife, he cut open the Mini Maglite for his wife and installed the batteries.

She placed it in her purse, then placed one set of bulbs on the shelf in the broom closet and Pappy Wilson gave the other packet of bulbs to Eli.

Eli then went to his room where he and Hannah lovingly talked over the chirp service for the next few hours…

Back to “a.D. MMIV”

Louisiana Lima Beans

My former neighbor and informally adopted sister had purchased some dried baby Lima beans the other day and charged me with the task of cooking them.

I made a pot earlier this week and I made another pot yesterday.

I think yesterday’s pot was the better one.

Therefore, this piece will be the recipe required to make that pot of Lima beans.

Without further ado, here we go:

1 Pound of dried Baby Lima Beans (I strongly suggest the Camellia brand.)
Four Slices of Bacon.
Cooking Oil.
Sea Salt and Black Pepper (to taste.)
Cajun Seasoning (also to taste [I strongly suggest the Camp Dog brand.])
White Onions, Red and Green Bell Pepper, Celery (this is known as The Cajun Trinity.)

*Sometimes comes blended with the Cajun Trinity.

Cut the four slices of bacon into neat little half-inch squares, then set aside.

Rinse the dried lima beans thoroughly in a colander under your kitchen tap.

Then place the beans in a decent-sized pot and add enough water to submerge the beans about three inches under.

Place pot on high heat and bring to a rolling boil.

Boil for twenty-five minutes (you may have to add additional water.)

When the twenty-five minutes are up, drain the beans into a colander and set aside.

Take the pot and line the bottom with cooking oil about one-eighth to a one-quarter inch deep.

Add the cut bacon, Cajun Trinity, Black Pepper, Sea Salt, and Cajun seasoning. Also, add the garlic and parsley at this time if not already included in the Cajun Trinity.

Fry contents on medium-high heat, stirring frequently until onions have dissolved and contents are lightly browned.

Add the beans followed immediately afterward by a liberal amount of water.

There should be enough water in the pot there to be at least two to three inches of it on top of the entire mixture.

As beans begin to get soft, mash them against the side of the pot with a wooden spoon and then shove the mashed beans into the mixture.

Adjust Sea Salt and Black Pepper to taste.

Keep the pot on medium-high heat until everything begins to thicken.

At this time, prepare a pot of rice.

Reduce heat to simmer until the liquid in the pot attains a consistency of gravy. Stir occasionally.

Turn the heat off and serve over a liberal amount of rice and enjoy.

Spring and eventually Summer are coming and I’ve been told all my life to pair this dish with some Fried Chicken and Tomato Sandwiches for a wonderful summertime dinner (or supper as the country people refer to it.)

Yes, God gave me the ability to cook food quite well.  Therefore I give him the glory for it!

Back to “The Dirty Drip Pan”

A review of a [Imitation] Leatherman Raptor

Just to cover my butt, I am not the owner of the featured image on this page.

I give all credit whereupon credit is due and in this case, I downloaded the image from eBay.

Since the late 2000s, I had been a fan of Leatherman Tools.

I bought my first Leatherman Tool in January 2010.

Since then, I have acquired and EDCed several other Leatherman Tools over the years.

Since the mid-2010s, I had coveted a Leatherman Raptor, but could never justify the cost of one, especially since I am not employed in the medical profession.

The Raptor series of Leatherman Tools is geared specifically towards paramedics and emergency medical technicians, although, I have also seen emergency room nurses carrying them as

I still think it is a neat multi-tool, even though I would never be employed in such a career.

I can’t explain exactly why I like this tool so much, except that between leaving my now ex-wife and the awful events of Hurricane Ida, I had lived in an apartment complex in the Houma suburb of Bayou Blue. While some neighbors gave me grief (Karens), I had other neighbors who were good as gold.

There was one middle-aged lady whose nephew I had befriended through my church. I and others would hang out at her apartment. She was shut in, due to her weight, and also on Oxygen.

As I have done since childhood, I always EDCed my gear in some form of a bag, and there was no exception when I would visit her.

She and several other neighbors began referring to me as “Inspector Gadget”, because of the tools and electronics I frequently carried.

I helped this lady fix her medical devices, phone, and tablet and I even installed her television antenna.

Sadly due to a fall, she sustained shortly before Hurricane Ida, my neighbor had to go into a nursing home.

My wife and I went to visit her and we hope to visit her more often in the future.

So what does all of this have to do with my Leatherman Raptor? You, the reader, may ask.

Yes, that is probably a good question.

I will try and answer it:

My former neighbors saw me as sort of a handyman but also in some ways as a step between what they could do and what first responders could do.

And I also frequently carried at least one scanner radio.

All of this made me want a Leatherman Raptor even more.

My wife saw how much I wanted one, so she bought me the next best thing for Valentine’s Day and that multi-tool is what this piece will be a review thereof.

And for anyone wondering what I bought my wife for Valentine’s Day, I will tell you:
I bought her a 5 D Cell Maglite with a Xenon Bulb.

Back to the review:
Yes, it is an imitation of a Leatherman Raptor down to every detail and seems to be as solidly constructed as a genuine Leatherman Raptor but for a small fraction of the cost.

Even if I were to get a real Leatherman Raptor sometime in the future, I will still cherish this one because my current and I fervently pray, forever wife bought it for me. I love her so much and I thank God for her!

So, even though it isn’t a real Leatherman Raptor, it has all of the appearance and functions of one.

I will now break tall the features down:
1) Folding Multi-Purpose Scissors-These are just like EMS shears and probably the most useful daily feature.
2) Seat Belt Cutter-Very handy when performing a vehicle extrication but could also be useful in everyday cutting applications.
3) Ring cutter-Another feature almost strictly for EMS, although maybe it could cut some wire as well?
4) Ruler-This could be helpful in a plethora of applications.
5) Wrench-Specfically an Oxygen Tank Wrench that I wish I could show off to my former neighbor.
6) Window Breaker-Also very handy performing vehicle extrication but in a pinch would be used in self-defense.

This multi-tool can be folded away and clipped inside a pants pocket until needed, thanks to the sturdy pocket clip. Also, the tool stays locked in place when unfolded until the push button locks are activated.

I think this particular multi-tool most resembles the original Leatherman Raptor and not the Raptor Rescue or Raptor Response, but I could be wrong.

All in all, it is a great tool.

Even for an imitation, I have to give it 5 out of 5 stars, because it is perfectly functional.

I guess this, therefore, concludes my review of the [Imitation] Leatherman Raptor.

And I hope that you, the reader, have been informed, enlightened, and maybe even entertained.

May God richly bless you!

Back to the review:
Yes, it is an imitation of a Leatherman Raptor down to every detail and seems to be as solidly constructed as a genuine Leatherman Raptor but for a small fraction of the cost.

Even if I were to get a real Leatherman Raptor sometime in the future, I will still cherish this one because my current and I fervently pray, forever wife bought it for me. I love her so much and I thank God for her!

So, even though it isn’t a real Leatherman Raptor, it has all of the appearance and functions of one.

I will now break tall the features down:
1) Folding Multi-Purpose Scissors-These are just like EMS shears and probably the most useful daily feature.
2) Seat Belt Cutter-Very handy when performing a vehicle extrication but could also be useful in everyday cutting applications.
3) Ring cutter-Another feature almost strictly for EMS, although maybe it could cut some wire as well?
4) Ruler-This could be helpful in a plethora of applications.
5) Wrench-Specfically an Oxygen Tank Wrench that I wish I could show off to my former neighbor.
6) Window Breaker-Also very handy performing vehicle extrication but in a pinch would be used in self-defense.

This multi-tool can be folded away and clipped inside a pants pocket until needed, thanks to the sturdy pocket clip. Also, the tool stays locked in place when unfolded until the push button locks are activated.

I think this particular multi-tool most resembles the original Leatherman Raptor and not the Raptor Rescue or Raptor Response, but I could be wrong.

All in all, it is a great tool.

Even for an imitation, I have to give it 5 out of 5 stars, because it is perfectly functional.

I guess this, therefore, concludes my review of the [Imitation] Leatherman Raptor.

And I hope that you, the reader, have been informed, enlightened, and maybe even entertained.

May God richly bless you!

Back to “Product Reviews”

Space Heaters and Rice Cookers-So many Young Adults Living in Poverty

I like many of those in mine and the following generational cohort live below the poverty line.

The purpose of this piece is not to explain why so many younger people and even those in their mid-thirties to their forties such as myself are prone to living in poverty.

Rather, it is simply some of my observations of choices such people make and items that they use.

That is why the title of this piece is “Space Heaters and Rice Cookers.”

I also wanted to title this “Space Heaters, Rice Cookers, and Broadcast Television”, but thought the original title was more catchy.

Many of these people live in trailers, some that are decades old and the central climate controls have long been shot. It could also be that they may live in site-built houses that are old enough to have been built before centralized climate controls.

Therefore, to have comfort in the winter time, many of these people resort to using space heaters, which can sometimes result in serious injury and/or loss of life if the end-user is not prudent. If they don’t have access to a space heater, they have also been known to lay a mattress on the kitchen floor and turn on the electric oven or stove.

In the Summer time, they cool their dwellings with cheap window air conditioners, and nowadays one does well if one of these cheap window units lasts for the season.

Sadly all of this runs up the electric bill!

There was a time when window air conditioners were made very well, in fact, my maternal grandmother, God rest her soul, had some window units that lasted at least thirty-five years!

The next item that I observe myself and many other impoverished younger adults using is a rice cooker. This could be for the following reasons: Rice is a staple around the world, though now increasingly here in The States, vitamin, mineral, and energy-dense food, it is quite affordable on almost any food budget, it keeps well in storage for an extended time and when paired with the right foods such as beans, it offers a complete protein, in addition to energy. Rice also makes more luxurious foods stretch further when they are served over it. I also many times heard teenage boys playing football and shouting at each other to stay on the opposing team member like “white on rice.” I think of many impoverished young men who were lifted out of poverty because of their athleticism, but the phrase “white on rice” rings low income with me for whatever reason. Rice cookers are quite efficient, especially when one either cannot afford a microwave or owns a low-wattage entry-level model of microwave. I didn’t realize that rice cookers were an appliance associated with poverty until I was watching an episode of Steve Wilkos and he mentioned it in an episode of his show I watched a few years ago.

Sadly space heaters and rice cookers operate by converting electricity into heat. And depending on the individual model’s wattage they can potentially run up an electric bill. However, they are needed by impoverished young adults for subsistence and comfort (sometimes life-saving warmth.)

And that brings up my next point:

Broadcast Television-I was probably one of the few teenagers who watched broadcast television, just for experimental purposes. My parents always had and still do have cable, but I wanted to experiment with what I could catch over an antenna. This was before the digital mandate and many times the picture was very snowy and the audio scratchy. I was amazed when pairing a digital television with a decent antenna how the picture was, dare I say even prettier than a picture carried on cable?! And many people around my age get it now. They may have wanted cable in their childhood and teens but realize that it has skyrocketed in price, yet plummeted in quality and this has been going on for some time now (since about 2010.) Because of technological improvements to broadcast television, there are more channels, with more diverse programming. One can even see shows that were originally for cable but now can be seen for free with digital television and a decent antenna. While I was married to my now ex-wife, I installed an antenna for my then-now ex-in-laws. Since their antenna was a really good model, I use to enjoy watching television at their residence. My ex-wife demanded that we subscribe to some form of cable, even though we couldn’t afford it and this was a major point of conflict in our former marriage. Cable is not even available where my current (and I pray, forever) wife resides, but even if it was we wouldn’t subscribe to it. I’m just glad there is a fairly decent antenna that comes with the place, that pulls in the channels fairly decently. I just wish the news available on broadcast television was either more moderate or better yet apolitical.

I was not poor as a child and adolescent.

I grew up in a lower-middle-class environment as a young child and it became upper-middle-class sometime between my tweens and teens.

However, I have been receiving a disability pension since age twenty (for various mental afflictions) and worked on and off in my late teens to mid-twenties.

At the age of twenty-four-going-twenty-five, I stopped working altogether.

I also injured my back at the age of twenty-seven, when I fell down some stairs while bringing up groceries.

So I am not working poor, but I have associated with many working poor adults to have been able to write this piece. It was either people whom I knew through the church, ex-in-laws, jobs that I worked in the past or just living in South Louisiana.

Many of us on disability pensions also are subject to similar conditions as the working poor though in some ways they have it better and in other ways, we have it better.

I also use a rice cooker and watch broadcast television on the regular, though I have been fortunate enough to not need a space heater as of yet.

People such as myself and other impoverished individuals and families are often sneered at by the middle class and some older generations. They don’t realize that the economy has changed and not for the better, mostly because they have been fortunate enough to be shielded from all these economic downturns and stagnant wages.

I could go on about this, but The Good Lord is telling me to cool it.

I probably should conclude the piece now, before I start getting more offensive than I need to be.

I need to get back to blogging on the regular, it’s just I need to find the time.

Back to “Articles I have Written”

Baked Barbecue Chicken

I would love to be able to hone my skills at cooking good barbecue.

However, at the moment, I do not have a barbecue pit nor do I want one because of my current living situation at the time of writing this.

So, I do the next thing and try baked barbecue, which is almost as good as if the food were cooked on a Propane or Butane fired barbecue pit.

I much prefer charcoal and would one day love to try some barbecue made on a wood-fired pit.

In this piece, I will describe my recipe for baked barbecued chicken legs.

I did this almost on a whim earlier this evening and it came out amazing!

First of all, let me describe my homemade barbecue sauce:

I know I must get on everyone’s nerves because I eyeball my seasonings, but I will try to accurately describe the portions and proportions of spices and condiments.

Also, some time ago, I read about putting mayonnaise in barbecue sauce, so I tried it earlier this evening and it came out pretty gosh durn good!

Ketchup AKA Catsup (very liberally)
Mayonnaise AKA My-Nez (three-quarters of this to the amount of Ketchup
Yellow Mustard (five-eighths of this to the amount of Ketchup)
Brown Sugar or Refined Sugar and Molasses (quite liberally)
Cajun Ninja “Pi-Yah” Seasoning (just a quick dash or two)
Black Pepper (sparingly)

You will need either fresh or thawed chicken legs, and I highly recommend Sanderson Farm’s AKA Mrs. Goldie.

Place drumsticks on a sturdy and, if possible, non-stick baking pan.

Preheat oven to 425 Degrees Fahrenheit.

Whilst waiting for the oven to get hot; coat the barbecue sauce on each piece until covered thoroughly.

Allow the sauce to sit on the chicken while the oven is heating, this somewhat allows a marinade to happen.

Once the oven has reached the target temperature, bake for 50 minutes straight.

Maybe turn your kitchen vent on to share the wonderful aroma with your neighbors, while the chicken is baking. Then again, you, the reader, might make them jealous.

Serve and enjoy.

Great side dishes to serve with barbecued meats, of course, are Potato Salad and Coleslaw.

Being on a disability pension, I have to budget every penny, but somehow my God still provides for me and meets my every need. He also provides me with wonderful food! I give Him all the glory because all the glory is indeed His!

Back to “The Dirty Drip Pan”

Multi-Racial Sloppy Joe

Yes, as we all should be aware, it is now towards the end of the month.

During this time, those of us on fixed incomes must need to get creative when trying to feed ourselves.

This was especially the case last night (at the time I am typing this piece.)

My wife and I had some grind meat (Cajun for ground beef) and a few other ingredients.

Normally, I would have made us some meatloaf with it, except that our oven is too small at the moment.

So, I made the next best thing, something I call “Multi-Racial Sloppy Joe.”

And this piece will be a recipe on how to make that dish.

I call Multi-Racial Sloppy Joe because it contains ingredients from different cultures and normally I am not one to cross food ethnicities unless I am crossing Cajun and German food.

Here are the ingredients:
Ground Beef AKA Grind Meat
Ketchup (I used the Clover Valley Dollar General Brand)
Imported Medium Hot German Mustard (an import niche brand sold at Big Lots)
Pace Medium Salsa
Red Bell Pepper Relish
Black Pepper
Seasoned Salt

Sliced White Bread or Hamburger Buns (optional.)

Place your grind meat in a pot and cook on medium to high heat until thoroughly browned.

Once browned, add all the ingredients.

I know this must irritate most of you out there, but I almost always eyeball my spices, herbs, and condiments and I did so in this case. Just adjust each ingredient to the taste that you, the reader, will prefer.

I will say that it should be sweet, savory, spicy, and tangy all at once.

Simmer on low to medium heat for about ten minutes and stir frequently.

You can eat this in a bowl almost like chili con carne` or on steamed white bread.

To steam the bread, place slices or buns on a wide microwave-safe plate, then sprinkle a handful of water on the bread and place in the microwave for 25 seconds.

Serve and enjoy!

Back to “The Dirty Drip Pan”

The First Hours of 2020-Second Chances


We lay on a blanket at the river levee until our Sunday School teacher says, “Well, it’s getting too cold for me, let’s head back home.”

“Sure thing. We need to take our medicine anyway,” I reply.

“Thank you for bringing us,” My girlfriend adds.

“Yes, thank you, sir” I also say.

“Y’all are quite welcome,” Our Sunday School teacher replies.

We then help him load everything into his SUV. He loads his two grandchildren into the third row of seats. After they are well buckled up, we sit in the middle row, clinging to each other.

Our Sunday School teacher drives through the traffic, narrowly missing several impaired drivers. Amazingly he still maintains a Christian vocabulary. It is something to be admired.

My girlfriend is laying on my shoulder half asleep and sweetly snoring. She is so cute.

We arrive at her roommate’s house and I gently wake her.

“Let me just make sure that my girlfriend takes her medication,” I tell our Sunday School teacher.

“Most definitely,” He replies.

We walk up the steps, across the porch and my girlfriend unlocks the door, though half asleep.

She and I walk inside and I help her pull out the bed of her futon.

“Please take your medication, bae,” I tell her.

“Could you get me a glass of chocolate milk to take it?”

“Of course.”

I go to the refrigerator and see a half gallon of Borden Dutch Brand Chocolate Milk and I pour her a glass, taking a small sip myself.

I then bring her the glass and she already has the pills out.

She pops them, then downs the glass of chocolate milk and climbs onto the futon.

I give her many kisses as I tuck her in.

In a sleepy voice, she says, “Come see me later today,”

She then grabs me and pelts my face with many more kisses as we exchange those three little words.

I kiss her once more, then exit the front door, locking it behind me.

My Sunday School teacher is waiting with his wife and grandchildren in their SUV.

I enter, sit down and buckle up.

They then drive me to my house.

Upon arrival, I thank them for bringing us, then wish them a good night and a happy new year.

I exit the SUV with my belongings, enter the gate of my hurricane fence, cut across my front yard, walk up my steps, across my front porch then unlock my front door and enter my house.

I drink some Pepsi and take my medication, then cover up and crash on my sofa.

Finally, I text my girlfriend to let her know that I safely arrived home.

We then exchange those three little words once more.

Soon, I am fast asleep…

Back to “Second Chances”

Christ or Conformity

Unsaved or saved, I think we all have idols in our lives, at least to some degree.

I’ll be the first to admit that I idolize happiness and I think those around me would agree.

As noble as it may sound to idolize happiness, in the eyes of God it is dead wrong.

It is especially wrong if our happiness is derived from doing anything that goes against God’s word.

So, yes, at least to some degree I am guilty of idolizing happiness.

There is another idol that I want to point out that many of those who surrounded me whilst growing up had.

That idol is conformity. And it is rampant among middle-class members of Generation Jones, in other words, Baby Boomers born between 1954 and 1964.

That subdivision of Boomers is known as Generation Jones because they were born when conformity was most idolized. This era was the time of “keeping up with the Jones.”

The idea of keeping up with the Jones was and still is conformity at its worst.

Just about all of the adults that surrounded me while growing up were members of this generational subdivision and it is now abundantly clear to me that they all idolized and still do idolize conformity. They strived to be like everyone around them and attain a useful higher education or skill, perform a meaningful career that pays enough to sustain a middle-class lifestyle, obtain home ownership, excessively shelter their children (they will always choose safety over freedom), be completely self-sufficient and mercilessly shame those who are not (because they feel the need to look down on others to feel better for what is missing in their own lives) and to not rock the boat at all. Furthermore, to not risk criminal charges, because that could disrupt their precious lifestyle indefinitely, they overlooked much wrong that was done to them both by the government and lawless citizens. They also feverishly taught their young to not associate with anyone who doesn’t espouse this lifestyle.

They put so much into their seemingly secure lifestyle and are willing to sacrifice everything, possibly even eternity, to keep it going.

In worldly terms, this is fine, actually more than fine as there still is a considerable group of people who live this lifestyle.

The people I am describing all were roman Catholics, with varying degrees of piety.

Please see the post “Why I am no longer a roman catholic.”

I will say that even the most pious roman Catholics are more into religion than an actual loving relationship with the Creator of the universe. They are more motivated by fear of going to hell than loving and being loved by Someone Who loves them more than anyone else ever has or will.

I know this post will rub some the wrong way, but I am writing it for the love of God and the love of my fellow man, whether it seems that way or not.

I believe God told me to write this piece and some of it has been on my heart and mind since about 2019. Today is January 6, 2023.

So yes, living a lifestyle that is one of conformity and the American dream will indeed give great things in this life.

But what about eternity?

I would dare say that very few of the people that come to my mind when writing this piece are indeed Born Again and that is the only requirement to be saved eternally from hell! I’ll even say that those in this group of people who are Born Again are also double-minded, one foot in the Kingdom, one foot in the world. See James 1:8.

These people are very religious. I’m not sure if it is to salve their consciences or if they genuinely get something out of regularly going to mass, saying rosaries, praying novenas, and any other catholic ritual.

And yes sometimes their prayers are answered, I will admit that.

But how often do they share the Good News of Jesus Christ? They won’t because they are afraid of angering others and maybe even somehow losing their place in this life.

It’s all about playing it safe and not testing the waters.

For fear of the unknown, they keep their mouths shut but at what cost?

I will admit that I am lax about this as well, but I try to whenever I am able and I need to share this Precious Truth more often.

I’ve never heard most of them talk about the need to be born again, except one person, one time and it was after I had faced a huge crisis. I think I can safely say though that the person who led me to Christ thinks I now take my faith in Christ too far! The person who led me to Christ, just wanted me to accept Christ as my Lord and Savior, then, afterward, keep quiet and not rock the boat at all. However, I was taught something else in just about every church I attended since.

The truth is people’s souls are at stake here!

Oh but these people who idolize conformity:

How often do they cry out to God earnestly when met with trouble instead of just reciting a vain repetition on a string of beads? Hardly ever!

They don’t rely on God for any provision nor do they often acknowledge Him for what they have. They can use their financial assets or connections to carry them through life or bail them out of just about any situation!

Because of that, they don’t realize how much they need God, yet He still wants them tremendously and might I add He does not need them?!

I know this is offensive. This is probably one of the most offensive pieces I ever wrote, but I feel as if God is telling me to write it.

My job is simply to present this information.

It is The Holy Ghost’s Job to convict of sin.

It is God’s job to judge.

Might I also add that Jesus Christ did His job to rescue us frail, fallen humanity from our sinful state so that we may have eternal life? He was tortured and ultimately shed his Precious Blood to accomplish this!

Christ commands us to be different from those around us!

He has the very right to command that or anything else of us because of What He paid.

As written in 1 Peter 2:9, “But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvellous light”

This applies to all who are Born Again and is meant to show the stark comparison between God’s Children (Born Again Christians) and the world (everyone else.)

Click Here if you wish to be Born Again.

I will leave you with what the Apostle Paul, wrote and it can be the theme of this entire piece it is from Romans 12:2 “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.”

Back to “Matters of Faith”

Our First Sunday Dinner-Second Chances


My church neighbors drive me home and we discuss what it will take to keep my next-door neighbor from further harassing me and what to do if he makes any more trouble with me.

“Tomorrow morning, we are presenting that video you sent us to the higher-ups in the city,” The lady says.

“If he starts any trouble with you between now and then, call 911, then call us,” Her husband adds.

“Will do,” I reply, then continue, “I just hope he leaves me alone since I am going to walk to my girlfriend’s house for dinner later today.”

“Is your neighbor correct about you and your girlfriend having intercourse in your house?” The man asks.

“No. He is wrong,” I pause, then continue, “We may have been alone together a few times but we never had intercourse, although we were tempted many times.”

“If y’all are alone together a lot, there will be chances for the sin of fornication to be committed,”

“My fear that God would punish us and cause us to split up is enough motivation for us not to have relations until we are married. I want her by my side for life and not only that, I want my relationship with her to be happy and fulfilling and I believe one of the ways to achieve that is to wait until marriage,” I tell them.

“That is so sweet,” The woman says, then continues, “My husband and I both come from broken marriages but we knew that our marriage had to be God-centered, and if none of our mental health skills would have saved it if it wasn’t.”

With that, we pull up outside the entrance to the gate of my hurricane fence.

I step out of their van with my backpack and the man says, “We will see you tomorrow night,”

“God willing, I’ll be there.”

They then drive off and I enter my gate then walk through my front yard.

The clouds and dampness seem to be moving away and it is now sunny and bright but still slightly chilly.

I walk up the steps, then cut across my porch and unlock my front door, then enter.

After I set my backpack down on my couch, get out of my Sunday best then turn my television set on.

I scan for channels and realize that because of the weather, more channels than usual are coming in.

For a few minutes, I sit and watch, until I get a text.

It’s from my girlfriend and it reads, “Come over a 1:30. I love you!”

So, I reply, “Will do and I love you too!”

I then look at my watch which indicates Noon Thirty Six.

I freshen up a bit and look for a shirt that is casual but still worthy of wearing while going out.

Finally, I find a Navy Blue Polo shirt with yellow stripes.

I put it on then sit and watch television until my watch indicates that it is 1:22.

With that, I turn off my television, then grab my backpack, and walk out the front door locking it behind me. I then walk across my porch, through my yard, and out the gate of my hurricane fence, then head east on the sidewalk.

Thankfully, my next-door neighbor is nowhere in sight nor is his truck parked on the curb in front of his house.

I walk briskly in the cool sunny air until I arrive at my girlfriend and her roommate’s house.

I look at my watch, which indicates 1:29:33 PM

So I knock on the door.

My girlfriend, dressed in black yoga pants and a gray shirt answers the door. I admire her for just a moment as those clothes accentuate all of her lovely features.

She then grabs me and plants a powerful on my lips. I feel so loved!

I play with her sexy love handles and then kiss her lips cheeks and neck several times in return.

She moans and coos with happiness, then we walk in.

I sit on her futon and she says, “Dinner will be ready in a few minutes, I hope you like it.”

“What are we having?” I ask.

“Oven Roasted Chicken with Carrots and Red Potatoes. Linguine Pasta with Butter and Three Cheese Blend. Steamed Broccoli Florets in a Butter Sauce.”

“Wow!” I say, then continue, “That sounds beyond amazing! I cannot wait to have some.”

“I cannot wait to see you enjoy it, but we need to make a plate for each of my roommates, for when they get off of work.”

“That’s fine.”

“Now you wait in the living room while I finish dinner,” She says as she wiggles her buttocks on me, then prances over to the kitchen with her hips swaying, her love handles bouncing, and her hair flowing from side to side.

In a few minutes’ time, she brings us both a plate.

We say grace then eat.

We both wolf down our meal as it is so good, blowing kisses at each other.

“You’re so sexy when you eat!” She tells me.

“So are you.”

“No, I mean I am highly turned on watching you so happily eat the meal I prepared!”

“I love you, baby!”

“I love you too, sweetheart!”

We then place the dirty plates in the dishwasher and turn on the television set and cable box.

My girlfriend tunes the cable box to the Hallmark Channel and we watch movies.

For hours we sit on her futon with arms around each other, sharing many kisses.

My girlfriend then points her buttocks in my direction and passes gas, then giggles.

“Oh baby, you are so hot!” I tell her as I grab her, hold her tightly and kiss her as I play with her hair.

“I only do that in front of you because I know you like it!”

“I wish you would sit on me and pass gas!”

Her eyes light up and she says, “That can be arranged…Lay down!”

So I lay on the sofa facing up and my girlfriend towers beside me.

I look up at all of her beautiful features, when she turns her back to me, then pulls down her yoga pants and says, “Thought you might like to see my cute panties before all goes dark for you!” She says with a naughty giggle

I stare up at her full-featured buttocks with a peach-colored granny panty covering them.

She is about to sit on my face with we hear car doors slam and horns briefly blare, indicating that her roommates are home.

Hurriedly she pulls her yoga pants back up, takes me by the hand, and pulls me up from the futon.

“Dang it!” I say.

“I”m sorry, sweetheart. I was looking forward to sitting on you.”

“You and me both.”

Her roommates enter the front door and go to each other their bedrooms.

After they come out my girlfriend serves them each their plates.

We then go sit on the porch steps, showering each other with affection until it is too cold.

We realize we both need to take our medication, so we exchange those three little words along with many hugs and kisses.

“Let me know when you made it home,” She says.

“Will do, my baby!” I reply.

My girlfriend then goes inside and I head home.

In due time I am in front of my house so I enter the gate of my hurricane fence, walk through my front yard, then up my steps and across my porch.

I unlock my front door, then enter and lock and deadbolt it once again.

Immediately afterward, I call my girlfriend, to which she sweetly answers.

I let her know that I made it home, then I give her our good night tidings, followed by us exchanging those three little words.

We then take our medication and go to sleep…

Back to “Second Chances”

Why I am no longer a Roman Catholic

Before you, the reader read any of this, I want you to pray and ask God to prepare you for it and to open your heart and mind to receive it. My job is to simply provide the information in this piece. It is The Holy Ghost’s job to convict and it is God The Father’s job to judge. Jesus Christ and Him alone paid the price it required to make it right between a totally depraved mankind and a Holy God.

What I am writing here is nowhere as palatable as I would like to think most of my work is, but keep in mind that I am trying to be as gentle and kind with it as I can be.

I know this piece will probably offend a great deal of those who read it, including members of my own family and my in-laws.

I can live with that and the reason why I can live with that is that I feel right in my convictions that the roman catholic church is counterfeit and not of God at all.

I believe that the roman catholic church is nothing more than a perversion of true Christianity, mixed with the ancient derivative of the Babylonian religion.

It was not started by Jesus Christ, although some translations of the Bible use the word catholic to describe the original church.

There was a church located in the city of Rome, in fact, the Apostle Paul wrote a letter to it and much good doctrine can be learned from it. See the Book of Romans in the Bible.

However, The Bible does not mention a specific roman catholic church headed by a pope. That was the invention of Constantine and his successors.

Peter was not the first pope. Constantine was.

In fact, the title “pope” or “holy father” are even calling priests “father” are complete blasphemies, as Jesus Christ commanded His followers to “Call no man your father upon the earth: for One is your Father in Heaven.” See Matthew 23:9.

Before I go any further, let me declare that I believe the Bible is the Word of God and the final authority. It says so in 2 Timothy 3:16, “All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness.”

I can point out many and will point out some instances in which the roman catholic church goes directly against The Bible and this is one of the many reasons why I cannot endorse roman catholicism and maintain a clear conscience.

One major blasphemy that the roman catholic church projects on its adherents are the teaching that its traditions are equal to Scripture.

Jesus Christ had something to say about this in the Seventh Chapter of Mark when He was dealing with the Jewish religious elite of the day. It is recorded in verses 7-9, “Howbeit in vain do they worship me, teaching [for] doctrine the commandments of men. For laying aside the commandment of God, you hold the tradition of men, [as] the washing of pots and cups: and many other such like things you do. And He said unto them, Full well you reject the commandment of God, that you may keep your own tradition.” Christ went on to say in verse 13, still addressing the religious elite, “Making the Word of God on none effect through your tradition, which you have delivered: and many such like things you do.”

Not only has Rome put tradition on equal footing with scripture but for much of its existence had forbidden most of its subjects from reading the Bible at all. Once religious freedom became more prevalent, Rome kept most of its subjects from reading the Bible by falsely claiming that if a lay person were to read the Bible, it would cause him or her to go mad. This is a cunning satanic tactic, used to keep these poor Catholics from learning about the True Freedom that is found in Jesus Christ as opposed to the terrible bondage of religion. The hierarchy of Rome wishes to keep these poor souls in their heavy merciless bondage instead of the light yoke that Jesus Christ has to offer. The most unfortunate truth about all of this is that most roman Catholics become more interested in a dead and useless religion instead of a loving relationship with God Almighty accomplished through the final, perfect, and all-sufficient sacrifice that was obtained from the precious blood of Jesus Christ shed on that Cross, almost two thousand years ago!

When writing to the young pastor Timothy, the apostle Paul, warned him of how even in their day which predated Constantine by nearly three hundred years that wicked people would come in and infiltrate the church. It is recorded in 1 Timothy 4:1-3: “Now The Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits and doctrines of devils. Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron; Forbidding to marry, and commanding to abstain from meats, which God had created with thanksgiving of them which believe and know the truth.

It seems to me that this passage was predicting the coming of the roman catholic church because the description fits it to a tee and maybe this is one of the reasons why Rome has either forbidden or at least strongly discouraged (depending on the time of his history) its subjects from reading the Bible? Just some food for thought.

Rome has brazenly returned to the priesthood, something that was done away with when Jesus shed his precious blood on the cross. Not only that Rome fervently teaches that forgiveness must be obtained through confessing one’s sins to a priest and doing whatever penance the priest commands. This is a most terrible kind of blasphemy and abomination. The sacrifice of Jesus Christ was and is forever there to provide a wretchedly fallen people with not only complete reconciliation but direct access to a Holy God. Matthew 27:51 describes how when Jesus Christ died, “…the veil in the temple was torn in two from top to bottom, and the earth did quake and the rocks were split.” This veil separated the Holy Room in the Temple from the Holy of Holies, which was filled with God’s presence. Only the Jewish Priest was allowed to enter the place and only at certain times of the year and while sprinkled with sacrificial blood. Anyone entering not under those conditions would die on the spot. Sometimes even the priest would die. But when Christ gave Himself, this system was done away with and anyone who surrenders his or her heart to Jesus Christ has direct access to God and such a person can boldly approach God’s throne of Grace with confidence to help them in times of need. The apostle Paul when writing to Jewish Christians encourages them to do this and it is recorded in Hebrews 4:16. I love how this is written to Jewish Christians, the very people coming out of this religious system of bondage. But, God did away with all of this bondage and He paid the most tremendous Price ever to do it. Do you, the reader, think He is amused that mankind has come in and replaced perverted what His Son accomplished and brought in a new system of bondage? The God I know is furious with all of this and He has every right and reason to be! All I can say is that He is merciful and takes no pleasure in the death of the wicked (see Ezekiel 33:11.) Furthermore 2 Peter 3:9 says this, “The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but He is patient not wishing anyone to perish but all to come to repentance.”

All I can say is that God’s Goodness is so immense that it cannot be measured!

However, fallen man’s depravity is almost as immeasurable as God’s Goodness!

The verse of Scripture that comes to mind when I ponder this is Romans 5:20-21, “But where sin abounded, grace did much more abound: that as sin has reigned unto death, even so might grace reign through righteousness unto eternal life by Jesus Christ our Lord!”

I could cover more aspects of the roman catholic church and how they are in direct violation of God’s word but I think I just need to point out one more and that is how Rome teaches that salvation is obtained through works when the Bible says otherwise. I know that many will argue according to James 2:26 that Faith without works is dead. Yes, that is very true. However, these works are the result of salvation, not the requirement of salvation. Furthermore, Ephesians 2:8-9 clearly states, “For by grace you have been saved through faith; and not that of yourselves, it is the gift of God, not of works, lest any man should boast.” Boasting in one’s works instead of the sacrifice of Jesus Christ as how one goes to Heaven and is saved from sin is severe blasphemy. And I’ve been around many Catholics and all I hear is boasting about their supposed good works. They say things such as, “I was baptized.” “I go to mass every time I am supposed to.” “I give to xyz charity.” “I obey the ten commandments.” “I was confirmed.” “I receive communion.” It’s just a whole bunch of I’s and nothing about what Jesus Christ did. The Bible says in Isaiah 64:6 that our own righteousness is like filthy rags before God. I am not a Bible scholar myself but I have heard other Bible scholars say that what filthy rags mean is used feminine products, to put it nicely. I’ve heard other Bible scholars say it means bloody bandages. Either way, it is nothing nice. If anything it’s beyond nasty. And in the Eyes of a Holy God, our good works, when compared to the sacrifice of Jesus Christ are that disgusting in his eyes. And yet Rome teaches that we must earn our way into Heaven through good works. Blasphemy!

If you, the reader, happen to be catholic, and somehow God has used these words to expose your religion for what it is, I promise you that there is indeed Hope and you don’t have to be subjected to this terrible bondage for a moment longer.

A little about me:

I was raised catholic, mostly in name only so that my parents would have an easier chance of my siblings and I getting accepted into catholic schools because they are a lot safer than the public schools in my district. Also, my parents believed that the strict discipline and rigorous curriculum would better prepare me for life.

From preschool through First Grade I wanted absolutely nothing to do with God. I resented my parents bringing me to mass every Sunday Morning or Saturday Afternoon.

However, by Second Grade things started changing and I began to take a liking to catholicism.

From Second Grade until about Sixth or Seventh Grade, I took mass and all the sacraments very seriously and I enjoyed going to mass.

I was a troubled child and only had a few friends, one of whom was and still is a devout catholic. He is also one of my friends from childhood whom I still keep in touch with regularly. I love him like a brother and I pray that he be freed from this catholic bondage.

From eighth grade until my sophomore year, I did my own thing, which was like a combination of catholicism, new age, and humanism all in one. I was in grave error.

During my sophomore year, I began reading the Bible earnestly. Also through my interest in radio listening, I began listening to many Christian broadcasts. This was preparing me for an encounter with Jesus Christ.

In the Summer between my sophomore and junior year, I became Born Again. The following October I started attending a really good Assembly of God church while also attending a catholic high school. This was a major source of conflict in my life.

There was one female classmate with whom I was good friends, never really a romantic interest just a good friend. She too was a devout catholic and had a heart of gold.

One morning in chemistry class the teacher decided to check if our textbooks were covered and if they weren’t we would get a zero out of thirty points. I’m not trying to be like Karl Marx, but this teacher had a strong middle-class attitude and some of the faults of the middle class are that they idolize achievement, education, and conformity to the point where they shun and sometimes persecute those who don’t. The teacher went around checking everyone’s book cover. The female classmate saw I didn’t have one, so after she was checked, she handed her neoprene book cover to me and I quickly covered mine but was still caught. Even though she is a devout catholic, she was following the command to “bear each other’s burdens” (see Galatians 6:2.)

From the church I was attending, I had learned of the shortcomings of catholicism but my heart was sadly not yet ready to accept it, knowing that, despite this chemistry teacher, there were some kind-hearted teachers at my high school, that genuinely cared about me and I had many friends and to learn that they were potentially hell-bound had ripped my heart to shreds. From learning this, I quit going to that Assembly of God church and went straight back into catholicism, which was the most foolish mistake I had ever made. The only defense I could claim is that I felt the same way that the Apostle Paul felt when he penned Romans 9:3, but I went about it completely wrong.

God could have let me fall away because of this, but instead, He dealt with me albeit harshly at times.

For years, like over a decade, I had lost my fellowship with Him.

Still He never truly left me nor forsook me, but He did allow me to go through some severe chastening.

Hebrews 12:11 says, “For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”

Furthermore, Verses 6 and 7 say, “For whom the Lord loves, He chastens, And scourges every son whom He receives.”

The Lord did severely chasten me indeed so much as to allow me to marry my first wife, who mistreated me every step of the way. However He also used that first wife to get me away from catholicism for good and as much as that marriage was unpleasant, it got me away from catholicism and possibly, if possible, losing my salvation.

At the age of 21, I started moving back to God, although I wouldn’t truly be back in fellowship with God until maybe the age of 33. I divorced my now ex-wife at the age of 31 going on 32.

All I can say is that God was tremendously merciful and faithful to me in that situation.

At the age of 34, my pastor told me that The Holy Ghost revealed to him that I need to be Baptized in The Holy Ghost. This is apart from water Baptism. I immediately began to pray for this. God told me that I would be Baptized in The Holy Ghost on the 34th anniversary of my being baptized into the catholic church. I accepted what He said, but was surprised. However, on March 29, 2021 (which is indeed the 34th anniversary) I was at a prayer meeting and I went down and asked to be Holy Ghost Baptized. Later that evening, I was speaking in tongues. The Bible doesn’t specifically say it, but I sometimes think God has a sense of humor.

At age 35 I married my current and pray forever wife. I love this lady and I want her until death. I find myself frequently thanking God for her and praying for my marriage.

Now, that was a brief testimony but I only used it for teaching, because this piece is about how to be right with a Holy God when one is a depraved lost sinner.

I think I have made it quite clear that roman catholicism is not the way.

Jesus Christ is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. None one gets to the Father (God Almighty) but through Him!  He even said so in John 14:6.

Please choose Jesus and not a religion…

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