I am a Lipophile (and I am Durn Proud of it too)!

My name is Eric John Monier and I am a lipophile, specifically, a heterosexual lipophile.

A lipophile is an individual who is attracted to overweight or obese people, in my case, overweight or obese women.

Those of you who know me well enough are already well aware of this.

I’ve been attracted to plus-sized members of the opposite sex as early as age 14, but I wasn’t completely open and honest about it until about the age of 19. Since my early thirties, I have also been attracted to super-sized members of the opposite sex.

From the latter parts of 2018 until December 4, 2019, I was in a very loving relationship with a super-sized young lady. No one had ever made me so happy. I didn’t care what others thought when they saw me with her in public. I was crushed when she ended it with me and I still am crushed. By the way, she didn’t cause me to also be attracted to super-sized women, because there were other super-sized women of whom I had been madly attracted to between leaving my now ex-wife and meeting her.

My now ex-wife is plus-sized but she resented my lipophilia with a hot passion most of the time.

I catch some flak about this attraction of mine from friends and family, every now and then. However, I was more worried about being harassed about this attraction by those who didn’t like me. Friends and family are in my life, but I don’t have any contact with those who don’t like me.

From early childhood up until my very early teens, I was not attracted to plus-sized members of the opposite sex. I used to say some pretty horrible things about them because the ones I had been around always were so mean. But the reason why they were so mean is probably that they were harassed so much. My Mom even tells me a story of when I was really little there was a heavyset woman checking out her purchases and she had walked backward to put something else in her shopping buggy. Well as she was walking backward, I started saying, “Beep…Beep…Beep…Beep…” In other words, most if not all larger vehicles and all mobilized machines make that beeping sound when moving in reverse as a safety feature. My Mom was so embarrassed by that. I’m not one to favor corporal punishment at all, but I hope I got a good butt-whipping for that because I am so ashamed of myself if I indeed did that. And for the record, I do NOT have a spanking fetish! As sharp as my memory is, I don’t recall doing that and maybe that is God’s grace upon me because I would feel absolutely awful with myself about doing something like that. I’ll admit I was a mean and hateful child and I don’t like how I was at all. I was still mean by the time I got to seventh grade, but things were starting to change. There was a girl who was in sixth grade and slightly plus-sized. I think she may have had a crush on me. I also had a crush on her, but never pursued her because of my pride. She was one of the few people in the whole school that was nice to me. Now she is married and my prayer about her is that her husband realizes what a wonderful person she is and he treats her as such!

I switched schools beginning in eighth grade. I was harassed a lot at my new school, but there were a bunch of plus-sized girls who were so good to me. I had crushes on several of them but never pursued them for fear of harassment. Looking back, I shouldn’t have given a single durn about being harassed and I should have pursued at least some of them. Around this time, I also came to realize that most plus-sized females have big breasts, nice butts, very sexy legs and when a pretty face is thrown into the mixture, I feel immensely giddy at the sight. I’ve also come to associate plus-sized and super-sized females with kindness, fidelity, and innocence, at least in my own mind and heart. And not only that, I have observed that many plus-sized and super-sized females look considerably younger than their actual age, especially after age 30. I sometimes see some plus sized ladies in their forties who could pass off as a twenty-something. I don’t see these qualities when I think of a skinny or a muscular woman. So when I say how I am strongly attracted to those body types, it is certainly not out of desperation. Furthermore, if I were truly desperate, would I not go after any woman of any body type that is willing? May it never be! I know I could never be happy with any woman that isn’t plus-sized or super-sized and the few times I was in relationships with skinny girls and women, I forever found myself longing for someone that was at least chubby. The times I was in relationships with women who were skinny-that was out of desperation, because no one else was paying attention to me, but they were.

Around the age of fifteen and three quarters, I was wrongfully and forcefully medicated on a drug that caused a little bit of weight gain. Prior to that, I was 5’4″ and maybe 115 pounds. Afterward, I was 5’6″ and 180 pounds. Looking back, this weight gain combined with my pride is what caused me to be a little more open about my attraction to plus-sized females. It also gave me enough courage to cause me to make a pass at one of them. Once I gained weight I wasn’t harassed as much. Then at the age of eighteen, I started losing weight and I was 5’6″ and 122 pounds. With the weight loss came harassment again. But as skinny as I was, I still desired only plus-sized females. By age nineteen, I was 5’6.5″ and in my 140-pound range. I also came out of the proverbial lipophile closet at this age. Many of my classmates in trade school harassed me as a result of not only being skinny and looking fourteen instead of nineteen but because of my vocalness about what size I am attracted to.

In January of 2007, I met my now ex-wife while I was pushing shopping buggies and bagging groceries at my then local grocer. She was plus-sized (still is) and that was what drew me to her, more than anything else. We had moved really fast. I mean we were already a couple on the day we met and six days later, she admitted that she wanted to marry me. We got along great for the first few years, but she suffers from hydrocephalus and after we tied the knot she needed a shunt revision. The built-up fluid on her brain caused some minor brain damage and altered her personality for the worst. She became mean, controlling and at times violent. I dealt with that for the next almost eight years, the first four because I did love her but the last four only because I fear God. I was not happy at all, but God carried me through it. I begged her to get help for herself, but she flat out refused. I left her in January of 2018. Our divorce was finalized on October 11, 2018. I’ve unfortunately seen her in person a few times since then and I will say that I am still attracted to her body, but I remember how terribly she treated me and my heart is severely repulsed though my flesh is still attracted but only to the physical.

In the latter parts of 2018, I had fallen for a super-sized young lady and the way she felt about me was mutual. No one had ever made me so happy. I’ve also never been more attracted to anyone else. I wish she and I were still together at the time of me writing this, but she gave up on me on December 4, 2019. We parted on pleasant terms. Honestly in the year and some months, we were together we never once argued, not even during the breakup process. I’m crushed as I stated before, but God will get me through it. My prayer right now is either that she miraculously comes back to me and our relationship heals or that God sends another super-sized young lady that meets my standards and doesn’t give up on me this time.

Yes, I am now gravitating more towards super-sized than plus-sized after how happy I was in my last relationship.

I used to call my lipophilia a perversion but when I spoke with one Christian minister about it he corrected me and said it wasn’t a perversion but a preference.

Still, I’m sure there are some who would maybe call me a pervert, but I don’t care.

I’m also sure there are those who think this is very disgusting, but let them, because the motives of my heart behind this plus-sized and super-sized attraction of mine are overwhelmingly pure.

Anyway, there are other types of philias and philes that aren’t so pure and good.

Lipophilia is not harmful to me or others.

And just for the record if by some unfortunate event I wind up with a skinny woman, I won’t try to force her to gain weight so she could be more attractive to me. That is, in my book, indeed a perversion and very unhealthy. Now if she was dangerously underweight, then yes I would because that would be the right thing to do. Induced weight gain was done to me when I was skinny by my now ex-wife and I vehemently resented it. There was another girl I was in a brief relationship with that gave me a several ultimatums if I wanted her and one of them was to gain weight. This is borderline abuse and I want no part of it. But in all honesty, I don’t want a skinny woman to begin with.

My lipophilia is a huge part of who I am (pun intended.)

I wouldn’t be me anymore if I suddenly stopped being a lipophile.

There are a lot of men who are looking for easy sex. Many times they make a pass at a plus-sized or super-sized woman and when she rejects them, they insult her about her weight. This is an extremely low thing to do, but I’m not surprised at all.

Well, I’m not looking for easy sex, but rather true love and happiness and yes, sex eventually comes with that. Many times, I do make an advance at a plus-sized or even super-sized woman but then she rejects me. However, I don’t insult her, because I strive to be a gentleman. Even though rejection is very hurtful, I don’t want to repay it with more hurt. I simply bid her farewell and then leave her alone. Whenever I do talk to a plus-sized or super-sized woman of whom I am interested, I make it a point early on to confess to her my lipophilia to her, but I obviously don’t use that word. However, I do ask her not to hold it against me. Some do and they are disgusted. Some don’t and they seem quite happy.

I guess this, therefore, concludes my pieces on my lipophilia.

I hope you, the reader, understand me better but also have been informed and maybe even entertained…

Back to “Personal Reflections”

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